Fear how to get rid of it. What methods are included in the treatment? Do your own self-evaluation in writing

Many people want to get rid of fear. They ask themselves and others questions: How to overcome fear? How to deal with fear? How to overcome the feeling of fear? How to get rid of fear forever? If people can get to know fear better, fear will seem to them only an illusion. Let's look fear in the face and see its true identity.

Looking into the World Wide Web, I realized that opinions about fear are divided. Here is what different people write about fear, and how they define it:

Fear is a very strong fear or fear.
Fear is an internal state that appeared in anticipation and anticipation of something bad.
Fear is always slavery, depression and tightness.
Fear is a consequence of the unfulfillment of the desire hidden behind it.
Fear is a sign of weakness.
Fear is a small death that brings oblivion.
Fear is a sign of weak faith.
Fear is a means of generating aggression.
Fear is a disease.
Fear is a brake that warns of a possible loss in the spiritual and material planes.
Fear is a very strong feeling, but a person without fear is sick.
Fear is a lack of trust.
Fear is poison.
Fear is an experience in front of the terrible, etc.
Fear is the unknown.

Perhaps you, too, could add to this list the various opinions that people have about fear.

Reading various information about fear, which is presented by some psychologists, psychics and magicians, you can really get scared. As a result of reading, there is a feeling that it is impossible to cope with fear, it is stronger than us and will always haunt us. But this is only a conclusion based on incorrect or incomplete information.

You can get rid of fear just like you can get rid of any feeling, provided that you don't resist the fear. Because everything we resist persists and presses on us.
Fear is just an emotion that manifests in a person when he feels the threat of loss. This may be the loss of money, reputation, life, beauty, influence, loss of relationships, recognition, things, etc.

Like any emotion, fear can come and go, and it can be reduced or nullified, i.e. let go completely.

Here is what Gail Dvoskin, the man who helped me and many thousands of people overcome fear, writes:
“Fear tries its best to deceive us, intimidating that if we face it and free ourselves from it, the worst will happen. In my experience, nothing is further from the truth. It is the ignored feelings dormant in the subconscious that bear fruit. Any fear in the light of consciousness weakens, and in the depths of the subconscious it gains strength and power.

Gale Dwoskin also offers his own method of releasing fear.

A simple way to get rid of fear.

“Sit back and focus. Think of something that scares you or makes you feel anxious - you can start with something small. Try to determine how strong this fear is, perhaps it is just a vague feeling. The intensity of this feeling doesn't matter - just categorize it and accept it.

Now ask yourself:
Can I let go of wanting this to happen?
Many people laugh at this question. “Yes, okay, stop it, I don’t want this to happen!”

Well, ask the question again and pay attention to your feelings. Basically, if you go back to your rhinestone now, you can probably feel the difference. So, focus on your fear or something else; you have to go through the questions of freedom from fear.

What can happen that will cause you fear?
What do you not want to happen?
Now, can you let go of wanting this to happen?

Once you get over the first shock of somehow wanting negative things to happen, it will be easy to let go of the fear because you don't consciously want it.

Focus on what you are afraid of. This may be the same question or a different one. Be clear about what might happen that causes you fear. If, for example, you are afraid of heights, this may be a fear of falling.
Can you let go of wanting this to happen?

Focus again on your fear or on something you don't want to do, that makes you anxious or nervous. Perhaps public speaking scares you. This may include the fear of making a mistake or looking like a fool in front of a huge audience. Whatever your fear hides: Can you let go of wanting this to happen?

What do you feel? Isn't it easy to break free like this? This technique will help clear the hidden recesses of the subconscious. After you let go of what you subconsciously wanted to accomplish, major changes will occur in all aspects of your life, including your well-being. Try experimenting with this simple method for yourself...

This method is ideal for times when your mind is filled with disturbing, frightening thoughts and there is no time for a long, deep process. Once you catch yourself thinking about a potential negative consequence, release it by asking yourself: Can I let go of wanting this to happen?
For more information about getting rid of everything unwanted, you can get by reading the book by Gale Dwoskin "The Sedona Method".

“Take the first step and you will understand that not everything is so scary”
Senneca Lucius Annaeus

It is possible to cope with a phobia on your own, but it is better to consult a psychotherapist. The main thing is not to let this process take its course and not try to avoid solving the problem. In order to overcome your fear, you should realize that in most cases all phobias are groundless and meaningless. It is important to learn to believe in yourself and your strengths, to lead a healthy and active lifestyle. In order to think less about a phobia, you should devote a lot of time to your favorite pastime, hobby.

You can try to face your fear. However, not everyone will be able to overpower themselves and use such a radical method. During a panic attack, you should breathe properly, be able to relax the muscles of your face and body, think about positive things. To get rid of fears, one should not resort to drinking alcohol, drugs or coffee, as this will only lead to excitation of the nervous system.

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General concept of pathology

Obsessive fears are distinguished by the fact that a person understands the meaninglessness of the phobia, but continues to be afraid. This phenomenon most often occurs in childhood and can haunt a person for life.

There are several hundred obsessive fears. Among them are the fear of heights, society, spiders, enclosed space, illness, intimate relationships, communication, and others. Such phobias are often uncontrollable and bring a lot of problems to a person, as it interferes with establishing a personal life, getting a job, communicating with friends and family.

Phobias can be classified based on the situation, specific object, age, symptoms, sex of the person. To date, scientists distinguish 4 groups of main phobias:

1. Zoophobias are fears that are associated with flora and fauna.
2. Social phobias involve the fear of everything that a person faces every day.
3. Agoraphobia - fear of open space. It can be doors, windows.
4. Fears that cannot be attributed to the previous categories. These include health-related phobias, fear of the dark, closed spaces, and many others.

Signs of obsessive fears

Phobias can be easily recognized by the following symptoms:

Feeling of difficulty in breathing, spasm of the throat.
Greater heart rate.
Feeling of weakness, faintness.
Numbness of the whole body.
Feelings of dread, intense fear.
Tremor throughout the body.
Urge to vomit, indigestion.
The body "does not obey" the person.
The person feels as if he is "going crazy".

The presence of a phobia can be said if at least 4 of the listed signs of obsessive fears are present.

Men's fears

In the modern world, there is an opinion that men are not prone to excessive experiences, and they are practically not afraid of anything. However, this point of view is erroneous, since representatives of the strong half of humanity also have many fears that men are trying to overcome:

1. The most common phobia for men is the fear of being alone. They are afraid to lose their soul mate, to be left alone, abandoned and useless. However, most men will never admit it because they don't want to look pathetic.
2. Fear of new relationships. Unlike women, who can easily plunge into new feelings, men try to hide their emotions, worries and tears. They try to control themselves so as not to fall in love again and lose their priceless freedom.
3. Fear of looking feminine, as in men this is associated with a weak character, humility and humility. If he at least once noticed feminine traits in his character or behavior, this fear will always be present in the mind of a man.
4. Fear of the subordinate. Many men love to gossip about "henpeckedness". If a young man noticed that his friend is completely subordinate to his other half, then this will cause a storm of protest. Therefore, men do everything possible not to find themselves in such a situation, showing their most masculine traits.
5. Fear of the loser. Every man wants to achieve material well-being and financial independence. Therefore, if he understands that he has failed in something, then he immediately enrolls himself in the ranks of losers. The positive side of this fear is that this phobia makes men become stronger, reach new heights, overcoming difficulties and obstacles.

It is hard for a man to overcome fear on his own, no matter what it is connected with. He will need outside help. However, he must understand that all fears are based on subjective factors and the characteristics of the man himself.

Most male phobias formed in childhood or adolescence. For example, if a young man was rejected several times by women, then this fear will remain with him for life. If there is a fear of meeting the opposite sex, you must immediately warn the girl about it. In most cases, such sincerity in the behavior of a man disarms the ladies. He can get acquainted with girls as much as necessary until he begins to feel comfortable in the company of a lady. A smart and tactful woman will help in this case. It all depends on the willpower and character of the man. Indeed, in order to overcome their fear, someone needs a delicate treatment, and someone needs a tougher approach.

Often getting rid of fears in men occurs with the help of alcohol. This is one of the biggest mistakes, because under the influence of alcohol you can only aggravate the situation. In order to overcome your fears, you can use other methods, such as hobbies, hobbies. It will help to cope with the problem of active rest, visiting clubs, going to the cinema. Physical activity can help you recharge your batteries and strengthen your spirit. It is better to give preference to such mobile sports as tennis, football, kickboxing.

Women's phobias

The difference between typical female phobias and male phobias is that they are not specifically related to one object, but represent a whole series of interrelated fears.

stay alone

This is due to the fact that a woman is afraid not to get married and sit up "in girls." Married women are afraid of adultery and being abandoned by a man, even if there are no serious reasons for that. Gradually, this thought becomes obsessive and develops into a serious phobia, depression develops. The reason for the appearance of such fears is a woman's inferiority complex, self-doubt and low self-esteem.

The fight against this kind of fear must begin with self-love. We must believe that every person deserves a good life and a respectful attitude towards himself.

Lose beauty, old age

This phobia is inherent in successful and self-confident ladies. However, over time, they begin to think about the fact that time is moving inexorably forward. The best solution in the fight against this fear will not be expensive plastic surgery and creams, but a healthy lifestyle, rational nutrition, active sports and positive thinking.

The phobia of old age most often begins to manifest itself in women over the age of 50 and is associated with its place in society and the family. This may manifest itself in the fact that they incorrectly indicate their age in social networks, profiles. Another option for the manifestation of a phobia is that a woman begins to dress out of age, while she looks ridiculous and funny. Women do not want to retire, take care of their grandchildren, referring to their social employment. Correction of this phobia should begin with awareness of one's "I". You need to learn to recognize and accept your age, along with its positive and negative qualities, to know the value of your years.

fullness

Fear of fullness can have quite dangerous consequences. Trying to look like models from glossy magazine covers, women go on radical diets, which leads to anorexia and disruption of the functioning of all organs and systems.

To get rid of this phobia, you should realize the value of your health. Instead of fasting, you can start to adhere to a balanced diet and lead an active lifestyle. This will help you maintain your weight.

Before childbirth

Fear of motherhood, which includes the fear of childbirth, pregnancy. A woman has a fear of childbirth, she is afraid of pain and death. This phobia is typical for women with an inferiority complex. The negative aspect of this fear is that it is accompanied by disruption of the autonomic system, adversely affects the process of conception, pregnancy and childbirth.

Worrying about the child is an integral part of the manifestation of maternal care. But we must not allow natural feelings to develop into a phobia that can affect the state of the woman's nervous system. You need to realize that childbirth lasts only a few hours, this is negligible compared to a whole life ahead. Modern medicine can provide a relatively comfortable birth (with the use of epidural anesthesia) and 99% guarantee that everything will be fine with a woman. The main thing is to call an ambulance in time at the first contractions. You need to read less stories on the Internet and tune in to the positive, since each birth is individual. If girlfriends or sisters had severe, painful and lasted a day, this does not mean that you will have the same. There are many reverse examples.

Insects, amphibians

The reason for the appearance of such fear lies in childhood. In order to get rid of the obsessive fear of insects, spiders and snakes, you need to look fear in the eye: pick it up, touch it.

driving car

The fear of driving a car is related to the fact that a woman is afraid of getting into an accident, damaging the car, violating traffic rules or being ridiculed by other road users. This fear does not need much correction. The fear of the road and cars goes away by itself after a woman acquires driving experience over time. You can improve your skills on training grounds or not very busy tracks.

Public opinion and condemnation by other people

Fear occurs most often in notorious and insecure women. In order to get rid of it, you should set clear priorities for yourself, realize that your own happiness does not depend on the opinions of other people.

Types of phobias and methods of getting rid

Any person can have one or more phobias that affect his character, behavior and attitude towards certain things.

Type of phobia	How to get rid?
Claustrophobia is the fear of closed spaces. Manifested by attacks of panic fear at the time of being in a closed space. It can be an elevator, a car. This group of fears includes the fear of the crowd.	It is necessary to try to communicate more with people who have already managed to overcome fear. You should not avoid crowded places and cramped rooms, since it is impossible to get rid of this fear in absentia. If an attack of fear arose in an elevator, then you need to focus your attention on some object, for example, buttons
Gerontophobia - fear of one's own aging and fear of communicating with older people	Doctors say that people who have their own point of view, who are difficult to piss off, and who do not give in to a melancholy mood, look good and retain their youth longer. Replace bad habits with good ones, think positively
Trypanophobia - fear of injections, syringes, injections, which is caused by the poor quality of medical care, the negligent attitude of doctors towards their patients	To avoid a panic attack, do not watch how the health worker does the manipulation. You should distract yourself with something, for example, listen to music, watch an interesting video
Aerophobia - fear of flying	Fly as often as possible. Each successful landing will leave a trace in the subconscious mind that flying in an airplane is safe. You need to buy tickets from a company that has a good reputation. When buying a ticket, you should opt for the middle row away from the window. Do not drink coffee before takeoff. Better eat a mint
Dentophobia is the fear of going to the dentist. People suffering from this phobia go to the dentist in extremely rare cases.	In order to alleviate the patient's condition, dentists recommend that all manipulations be carried out in a state of sedation. Before visiting the dentist, you should think about the fact that modern medicine has a large number of new painkillers. You can chat with loved ones who have recently been to the dentist, and nothing happened to them. It must be remembered that even the most severe pain in a person is erased from memory after 3 hours.
Insectophobia - fear of insects, especially ants and bees	When meeting with an insect, you need to breathe deeply, try to relax and even smile. You can develop a program for yourself that will help get rid of this phobia in a few months. To do this, you first need to learn how to be in the same room with an insect for up to 3 minutes. Then do not be afraid to approach a distance of 2-3 meters. After that, you need to overcome your fear and not be afraid to watch the insect for 1 minute. It is necessary to learn how to cover the animal with a jar or bucket tied to a long stick
Herpetophobia is the fear of reptiles. This fear is not rare. He is mainly associated with lizards and snakes.	The best way to get rid of this phobia is hypnotherapy. In order to cope with fear, you should learn as much interesting information as possible and read about reptiles.
Agraphobia is a phobia of sexual harassment. Signs of this fear are rapid heartbeat, shortness of breath, dry mouth, increased anxiety	If the fear of sexual harassment prevents you from living, communicating normally with the opposite sex, then treatment by qualified specialists is recommended. In the process of therapy, methods such as suggestion, conversations, hypnosis are used.
Autophobia is a pathological fear of being alone. The feeling of fear arises in situations where a person is left alone, trying to occupy himself with something, but this is to no avail.	It should be realized that it is impossible to be in communication with people all the time. Loneliness is quite normal. You need to find an occupation that will not give you the opportunity to be sad. It could be a new job, hobby, hobby, pet.
Agoraphobia is the fear of open spaces. It can be large squares, deserted streets	You should relax, close your eyes and imagine how a person comes home and crosses the threshold of the house, continues to move around the apartment with slow steps. If at any stage there is a feeling of discomfort, you should start the journey all over again. It should be understood where the “anchor point” is located, what makes a person stay at home. The size of the point should not be more than 1 cm. When a person finds this place and feels comfortable there, one should move further until the fact that the comfort zone is created only by the person himself and no one else is realized
Algophobia is the fear of pain. The reason for the development of this phobia is the pain experienced earlier in an unpleasant situation, for example, in a fight.	You should do auto-training 3 times a week, study relaxation techniques such as yoga, acupressure, taijiquan. During a panic attack, you should take deep breaths and exhale with your stomach.
Spectrophobia - fear of mirrors and reflection	You should overcome yourself and stand in front of the mirror during the day, start saying pleasant words to yourself, the room, the mirror. You can invite someone close to you to help

You can not wait until the process goes into a more severe form. If you miss the moment of the beginning of the development of fear, then it will be impossible to overcome it on your own.

Look at the environment and life from a positive perspective. If you imagine an unpleasant future, then the situation will only get worse.
Face the phobia eye to eye. The method is quite radical and quite effective. Although not everyone can dare to do so.
Ability to relax during a panic attack. You can start talking loudly, singing, laughing.
Breathe correctly. Convulsive sobs and sighs will not help to overcome an attack of panic fear. Breathing should be calm, even, deep and rhythmic.
Complete relaxation of the muscles of the body and face will help you calm down faster.
You can not use drugs, alcohol and coffee to overcome your phobia. This will only aggravate the situation, since these methods act excitingly on the human nervous system.

Special techniques for dealing with fears

There are many special psychological techniques that will help you overcome fear on your own.

1. Technique "face to face".

This technique should be practiced twice a day. For 10 minutes, you should think only about your fear, bringing yourself to the state of the onset of a panic attack. Its paradox lies in the fact that in order to get rid of fear, one must experience strong emotional discomfort. After a few minutes, the person begins to realize that there is no danger. You just need to calmly repeat those thoughts that caused anxiety before. This state must be maintained for all 10 minutes, otherwise everything will be useless.

This technique is based on the ability of the nervous system to quickly recover and stabilize after a strong emotional shock. After a few days of this technique, a person notices that he simply has nothing to fill these 10 minutes. He will begin to get bored, as the feeling of fear will gradually disappear. The stress system of the body will no longer react violently to the appearance of an irritant every time.

2. The technique of writing down your fears.

In order to overcome an obsessive fear in yourself, you can try the technique of writing down your phobia. It consists in the fact that during the day you need to literally write down all your thoughts that arise about fear from the moment the excitement began until it ends. You should not try to write everything in the form of beautiful sentences. You can just word for word as a stenographer at a meeting.

The essence of this method is that when fear passes from a person's consciousness to paper, it materializes, acquires features and, as a result, looks primitive and meaningless. After a while it will become uninteresting to write the same words, and the fear will gradually go away.

3. The technique of singing your phobias.

The technique of singing fear helps to get rid of obsessive thoughts. You need to sing exactly as they appear in your head. If a person sings, then he simply physically cannot remain in a stressful state. It is necessary to choose a short phrase and sing it to a simple tune for several minutes. As soon as the negative sensations begin to disappear, you must immediately switch your attention to something else.

4. Technique for changing the picture in the head.

This technique works well in cases where a person cannot convey his feelings in words, since they are only a picture that arises in the head. At the time of the appearance of fear, you need to imagine a picture that is completely opposite to your phobia. For example, if a person suffers from claustrophobia, then you should immediately imagine yourself in a large open field. If a person is afraid of some kind of illness, one must imagine oneself happy and healthy.

Do not be afraid to seek help from a specialist. It is necessary to distinguish between a psychotherapist - a doctor who deals with mild mental disorders, such as phobias, and a psychiatrist, who treats serious illnesses, such as schizophrenia, and who can register the patient. Seeing a psychotherapist has no consequences. The doctor will not prescribe serious drugs, but will help to cope with the phobia with the help of conversation, suggestion, hypnosis.

Fear is a natural and necessary emotion for life, or rather an affective state. Healthy fear ensures self-preservation. This is a sign of intelligence and fantasy, the desire to live. Justified fear, such as the fear of a fire due to an electrical appliance left on, is helpful. Like pain, it warns us of a possible or emerging problem. But what if the fear is out of control and interferes with life? Read on.

Like any phenomenon, fear can be viewed from two sides, positive and negative:

The negative power of fear is that, being uncontrollable or turning into anxiety, behavioral disorders and the like, it spoils the life of an individual.
The positive power of fear is that it provides development. From the fear of ignorance, schools appeared, from the fear of death and injury in road accidents, mechanics improve cars, the fear of poisoning makes us carefully process and store products.

The difference between fear and anxiety

Fear is an emotion that is closely related to another one - anxiety. Sometimes these definitions can be confused. However, there are 3 characteristics that distinguish between these concepts:

Fear is more specific, for example, there is a fear of heights. While anxiety does not have a clear outline.
Anxiety is a subjectively significant emotion. It is caused by things, values that are significant for a particular individual. Anxiety arises against the background of a threat to the personality itself, its essence, worldview.
Before anxiety, a person is often helpless. For example, if uncertainty causes anxiety during an earthquake, then a person cannot influence this.
Anxiety is a constant phenomenon, fear is caused by a specific situation.

Specificity of fear

We can distinguish between real and false fear:

The first we experience in critical situations. For example, when the car got into a snow drift and is about to roll over.
False fear - imaginary feelings about what did not happen (“What if I get into a skid?”). We need to fight against false fears.

When we experience fear, there is an increase in sensory attention and motor tension. That is, we observe more actively and are ready to quickly run (act).

Uncontrolled and unprocessed fears turn into phobias and anxieties, which provokes personality neuroticism.

Signs of fear

Signs of fear include:

anxiety;
anxiety;
jealousy;
shyness;
other subjective states;
uncertainty;
physiological changes;
avoidance of the object of discomfort.

Reasons for fear

Among the reasons are:

self-doubt and other disorders;
childhood psychological trauma;
constant stress and often recurring critical situations;
the instinct of self-preservation.

The last reason encourages normative fear.

As noted by V. A. Kostina and O. V. Doronina, fear can be hereditary. Moreover, women are more likely to have social fears, and men - the fear of heights. By inheritance, the fear of heights, darkness, fear of doctors, punishment, loss of loved ones is transmitted.

How dangerous is fear

With fear, a number of physiological changes occur in the body. The work includes the hypothalamus, pituitary gland and adrenal cortex. As a result of activation of the hypothalamus, corticotropin is produced. It in turn includes the nervous system and the pituitary gland. It triggers the adrenal glands and produces prolactin. The adrenal glands secrete cortisol. Along with this, adrenaline and norepinephrine are produced. Externally and internally, all this is manifested:

pressure increase;
increased heart rate and respiration;
opening of the bronchi;
"goose skin";
decreased blood flow to the organs of the digestive and reproductive systems;
pupil dilation;
the release of glucose into the blood;
fast burning of fats;
increased acidity in the stomach and decreased production of enzymes;
shutdown of the immune system.

That is, the body comes into tension and becomes at a low start.

In real danger, this allows you to think faster, see better, hit harder, run faster. But if the fear is imaginary and constant, then the body does not benefit from everything that happens to it at this moment. That is why, against the background of fear, psychosomatic diseases develop:

stool disorders,
bronchial edema,
dyspnea,
chest pain.

Thus, there is a vicious circle. For example, you are afraid of getting sick, but against the background of fear you get sick. In addition, the more often you experience fear (stress), the less you can rationally assess the situation, which results in chronic phobias.

Just don't say that now you have a fear of fear (that was not my goal). In any case, we'll deal with it now. Read on.

The most popular fears: description and solution

One of the most popular fears is the fear of death (of one's own or loved ones). This is the most controversial phenomenon:

On the one hand, it can reach such proportions that a person will close within four walls and simply rewind the allotted time.
But on the other hand, this is a normal fear that makes us look around when we cross the road.

The only way to deal with it is to accept it. All people are mortal. It makes no sense to experience death several times in your thoughts and darken yourself with this all your life.

Other popular fears include fear of others, of oneself, of time, of fear.

Fear of others

The basis of fear is criticism, moreover, yours in the first place. To overcome this problem, try not to criticize yourself, but to praise. It is human nature to project our shortcomings or problems onto others, that is, in people we notice and scold what we do not accept in ourselves. And, as it were, we play ahead of the curve until it is noticed here. That is, we are afraid that our shortcomings will be noticed. This also includes:

pickiness;
resentment;
revenge;
unpleasant character traits (conflict, deceit, dishonesty, avoiding problems, indecision).

If you notice this in people and are afraid to experience it for yourself, then you probably already experienced it in your face a long time ago. On the same basis, there is a fear of seeming ridiculous, falling under the evil mood of someone. Solution to the problem: show yourself what you want to see in others.

Fear of self

We are talking about the fear of one's own ailments, imperfections of the body, loss of strength and the like. For such a problem, the solution is to achieve harmony of the body, brain and soul. This is a very difficult and wide path. Simply put, this is getting rid of psychosomatics.

Learn to listen to your body and accept the fact that it is a system capable of self-regulation, if it is not interfered with by imaginary fears. Have you ever said: “I don’t understand how I could do this. Now I won’t repeat it on purpose”? Here is the answer.

Fear of time

Learn the principle of "here and now." Fear of the passing time is often accompanied by self-flagellation due to postponing something for later or to the will of fate. You need to learn how to act and take responsibility for your actions.

Get rid of laziness.
Embrace the principle of "everything has its time," but in the context of your fulfilling your life plan and creating favorable conditions, and not waiting for the intervention of external forces.
Scroll through the situations in your head before doing something in practice (of course, only with a happy outcome).

Fear of fear

First of all, learn to call a spade a spade. Not "I'm nervous", but "I'm afraid of something". Basically, it's about the fear of the unknown. Read about overcoming it in the paragraph “From fear to freedom” of this article.

Learn to overcome your fears and use them for good. There is no need to be ashamed of fear, but you need to overcome it and resist. The optimal method in this case is the “wedge by wedge”. It's important to face your fears. If in alcoholism treatment begins with the acceptance (voicing, recognition) of the problem, then the correction of fears begins with a confrontation.
When working with fears, it is important to understand that it will not work the first time. You must be aware that it will not be easy, but it will be worth it. In case of failure, prepare an alternative plan (people with fears are best at coming up with workarounds), but use it only as a plan B.
Pretend you're not afraid of anything. Imagine that you have to play a role on stage. After a while, your brain will believe that you really are not afraid of anything.
Fears about the future are the least justified. You create your own future, so pay attention to the present. Fears about him are much more justified. By torturing yourself with something from the future, you spoil your whole life. You exist, you don't live.
Accept the fact that our life consists of white and black stripes, sometimes gray. Troubles, difficulties and uncertainties will often appear. It is important not to be afraid to face it, but to be sure that you can handle it. To do this, you need to be the master of your life.
Most fears come from childhood. But, firstly, a child and an adult perceive the same things in different ways. Secondly, often fear or disagreements with a particular person are projected onto an object. For example, you have problems in your relationship with your parents, but you are afraid of the dark (you were once locked in a closet). Then there is only one solution - to let go or discuss grievances.
Have you noticed that fears are always directed to the future (even if they are based on the experience of the past), and fears develop through imagination? So why not redirect your forces, for example, to creativity? Learn to switch attention. Understand that working through future events that most likely will not happen, you spend real physical, intellectual and psychological strength. Don't you feel sorry for this?
Fear of the unknown is the most unjustified. You do not yet know the object (phenomenon) itself, so how do you know that you need to be afraid of it? Try it. Haven't been on a plane? Try it. And then decide whether you will be afraid or not.

I want to make a reservation that you can not rush into the pool with your head and neglect your safety. That is, living a full life without fear does not mean going snowboarding, getting hurt and remaining disabled. Living without fear means making decisions yourself and being responsible for them, understanding all the risks and possible consequences.

The body is able to heal itself. Your task is to bring him out of a state of eternal tension. And that's what relaxation is for. We are talking about conscious relaxation of the body, replacing negative emotions with positive ones. But once again I remind you that you need to get rid of only unhealthy fear.

Plan of Healing

To overcome fear, you need to consistently solve a number of problems.

Change faith in the bad (this is fear) to faith in the good. There is a recipe for everyone here: someone turns to nature, someone to spirits, God, their own old pleasant memories.
Next, find support in someone and give it yourself.
Learn to listen to your body and trust your intuition.
Find the root cause of false fear.
Make up your recipe for courage. These are detailed aspirations (desires) and ways to achieve them. It is important to describe not only what needs to be done, but also what you can do.
Refocus attention from the result to the process.

You can read about each of these points and how to do them in L. Rankin's book Healing from Fear. The paper gives practical recommendations on meditation, the search for inner strength, the development of courage. For each element (beliefs, courage, search for causes, etc.), a whole list of techniques with a description is presented. The author presented so many techniques in one edition that I think you will definitely find something for yourself there.

From fear to freedom

If you are still reading this article, then you are probably trapped in your own fears and are looking for a way to freedom. Right? Well, he is. Includes 5 items:

Exit from the unconscious. It takes more energy to avoid the risk than the risk itself. A person is driven by the thought “better reliability than regrets.” In order to step over this stage, ask yourself the question: is your comfort zone really the same for you? Imagine who you could be if it wasn't for your fears.
Getting out of your perceived comfort zone. At this stage, a person is driven by the belief that uncertainty is the only constant and clear in his life. That is, a person understands that he infringes on himself, but remains in the old place. At this stage, it is important to stimulate yourself with praise. You are a brave person and will be able to get out of your zone.
At the third stage, a person is not afraid of uncertainty, but does not look for it either. Doubt more, be curious.
The search for the uncertain, the unknown, the new. Learn to see possibilities.
Acceptance of uncertainty as such (in the concept of the world). Realize that anything can happen, but any event has a meaning.

The fifth stage is the final one. This is the very freedom without fears that you need to enjoy. However, this is the most unstable stage. Your freedom must be constantly reinforced and maintained by practice. Otherwise it is easy to lose it.

Emergency help

If fear caught you by surprise, then you can quickly find inner strength by switching attention. As you become aware of your fear, direct your attention to your most intense passion, desire. Focus on it. Want it so much that there is no room for fear. Even if the objects of passion and fear are from different "worlds". Convince yourself that you will quickly deal with what scares you, and then do what you want.
The second way to quickly overcome fear is to imagine what it deprives you of. Usually people evaluate only one side: what fear saves them from. Imagine how much fear stifles your potential, your individuality, originality.
Practice self-indulgence. Repeat daily in front of a mirror, “I am the master of my life. Everything that happens (both good and bad) depends on me. There is no place for fear, as well as meaning in it.
If the fear is clearly defined, then thoroughly study all its aspects. Look him in the face. Find the positives.
The most non-standard and categorical method of struggle is concern about the consequences of anxiety. This is a dubious way, but it exists. Imagine how the situation will worsen from your experiences (after reading this article, you know what your body experiences during a period of fear). Oddly enough, from the realization of "playing against yourself" you will calm down. But I must say right away that the method is not suitable for everyone. You can go into even more self-torture. Be careful!

Childhood fears

Despite the individual nature of fears (although, as we remember, they are not as subjective as anxiety), they are based on the actual need of age. Therefore, we can generally classify fears by age:

Up to six months - fear of sharp and loud sounds and movements, loss of support.
From six months to a year - fear of dressing up, changing habitual, strangers, heights.
From a year to two - fear of doctors, injuries, separation from parents.
From two to three years - fear of the dark, parental rejection, animals, loneliness, nightmares.
From three to seven years - fear of insects, water, heights, fairy-tale characters, misfortunes, disasters, fires, schools.
School period - fear of harsh sounds, death, physical violence, loss of loved ones. Along with this, social fears arise that persist in the future (fear of being late, not coping with the task, getting punished). If you do not work out these fears, then there will be a fear of not living up to expectations, of looking stupid; relationship problems.

Age fears are normative if the child does not drop out of life (sociable, open). They will pass on their own. But if the child avoids communication, is constantly scared and worried, then professional correction is needed.

Children's fears can be imitative or personal. In the first case - copying someone's behavior, in the second - their emotions under the influence of difficult situations.

In addition, fears can be short-term (up to 20 minutes), quickly passing (leave after a conversation), protracted (up to 2 months, even with corrective work).

Children's fears: what to do?

You can fight children's fears with the help of fairy tale therapy. As part of this, I recommend that you familiarize yourself with the book by R. M. Tkach “Fairytale Therapy of Children's Problems”. In the work one can find not only a description of the method, but also the material (plots) of the fairy tales themselves.

Do not shame the child for fears, but ask about them. For example, what he saw, and how it looked, what it came for.
Accept the child's fear and tell a real or fictional story of personal fear and overcoming it.
Do not close the child in a dark room for the sake of punishment, do not scare the child with Baba Yaga or the "evil uncle" who will take him away. This is a direct path to neuroses and fears.
Ask what the child is watching or reading. Discuss it together.
To overcome specific fears, use fairy tale therapy or ridicule of fears.

Ridicule involves the visualization of fear (on a piece of paper) with the subsequent addition of funny (for a child) elements to it.

I also recommend the book by S. V. Bedredinova and A. I. Tashcheva “Prevention and correction of fears: a textbook”. It presents many practical options for therapy with children to overcome fears. Listing methods here, I think, does not make sense. The manual describes puppet therapy, and art therapy, and a correction program, and much more (with indications and contraindications for each method, features of the implementation). The phenomenon of children's fears themselves is also described.

Results and literature on the topic

Fear is the echo of the animal in man, the primitive. Previously, this emotion was justified even when it was constant. But in the modern world, this prevents a person from living. The situation is even more aggravated if fear is intertwined with anxiety, shame, guilt and other emotions.

The danger of fear is not contrived. It not only creates psychological discomfort, but also destroys the body on a physical level. In part, the phrase “Whoever is afraid of something will happen to him” is true. And this is not about the supreme forces, the attraction of misfortunes and ailments. The thing is that, experiencing fear, our body radically changes its work: an excess of hormones arises (with prolonged excessive influence, they provoke imbalance and intoxication, destruction of organs), the digestive and reproductive systems fade into the background, the activity of the cardiovascular system is gaining momentum . A person can actually get sick.

It is necessary to get rid of fear (I remind you, false fear). But only children's fears can go away on their own. Adults will have to consciously break themselves, rebuild their belief systems, challenge themselves constantly, make a plan of action.

I recommend reading another book: D. T. Mangan "The Secret of an Easy Life: How to Live Without Problems." The author reveals his own concept, according to which we are a complex mechanism that requires flogs to enable or disable systems. The book is a practical guide to restructuring your thinking, including getting rid of fears. For each problem, Mangan suggests using a unique password. These are the words to be used in difficult situations. And from them, supposedly, the situation will turn in your favor. I myself have not tried this approach, so I can’t say anything good or bad. But in my opinion, the very idea of the concept is interesting.

In the fight against fears, as in any business, the main thing is the beginning! You yourself will not notice how the fight will become easier. Gradually it will no longer be a struggle. Well, the result in the form of complete mental freedom is the highest reward. I wish you success in the fight against inner demons!

Anxiety and fear... The eternal companions of man, from the cradle to the grave. Surely you still remember how, as a child, you were scared to shiver of a dark far room, how you thought that terrible monsters live there and are waiting for the right moment to grab you and eat you ... You grew up, and children's chilling fears were replaced by others - adults , "serious". What are you afraid of now? Perform in front of an audience? Stay alone? Or maybe get sick and die young?

It's okay to be afraid!

Fear is a natural feeling of a person, it has long helped him to survive in sometimes difficult environmental conditions. This is our bodyguard. And there is nothing wrong with him, unless he "guards" us too hard. If it does not haunt us constantly and does not interfere with a normal life.

It is common for a person to be afraid of many things: darkness, heights, water, dogs, insects, mice, poverty, diseases, open space, closed space, etc. But are anxiety and fear always justified? Fortunately, no. There are not so many dangers in life. Most human fears have no objective reason. These are imaginary fears. And they have no place in the life of a sane person.

The worst fear

But how to get rid of the fear of death, for example? You are so accustomed to this feeling that it seems impossible not to be afraid to die! Everyone is afraid of this! And somehow they live with it ... Somehow. Tense. Not sure. Painfully.

But let's deal with the fear of death. Why fear what cannot be avoided? Every living being on the planet will die sooner or later. A priori. So is it worth overshadowing your existence with useless anxiety? Is it worth it to turn it into a living hell, torturing yourself with an unfulfilled desire to live forever? Wouldn't it be more pleasant to accept with gratitude the opportunity to stay on Earth for a while? And enjoy every moment?

How to get rid of the fear of death? Paradoxically, the easiest way is to accept it, put up with it and don't try to get rid of it! The more we fight with fear, the more strength and energy we lose. Accept your inevitable fate. Humble yourself. You will die anyway, whether you like it or not. It's pointless to be afraid. Try to explain this simple idea to your mind in an accessible way. He will understand.

We declare war on phobias

With the fear of death, everything is more or less clear. This is familiar to everyone. But there are such fears of people that many are not aware of. But what about you - the one who lives with it? For those who are afraid to admit it even to the closest person ... How to get rid of fears and anxiety before the upcoming trip? Before a public performance? What to do if you are afraid to ride in public transport, because there are so many all sorts of pathogenic microbes? In the end, how to get rid of the fear of being eaten by terrible monsters living in a dark back room, which has been tormenting you since childhood?

Take a pen and a sheet of paper. To get rid of fears, make a list of everything that you are afraid of. Don't lie, write everything. Admit to yourself all your fears. Analyze each one carefully. Why are you afraid of this? Is it worth it? Is there an objective reason for this or that concern? This way you can separate real fears from imagined ones. Leave the real ones, perhaps they will someday save you from trouble. And with the imaginary will have to work.

If you are overwhelmed by some kind of mental fear, remember that you are a person, and you are worthy of joy and happiness. Think about what gives you pleasure - and fear will go away by itself. One situation or another may or may not occur. Your fear may be empty and meaningless! Why do you need him? Leave it and be open to any manifestations of life. In any case, this is your experience, and it should be different.

In a state of panic and anxiety, deep breathing will also help. Consciousness will calm down - and common sense will return and help solve the problem.

How to get rid of fear if it does not give in? Go for the trick! Try to get angry at yourself, at circumstances, at someone - it doesn't matter. Anger neutralizes fear, and in return comes the determination to act and change things.

Through fear to new heights

Remember: when a person overcomes his fears, he grows and develops. His horizons become wider, the boundaries of the personality expand, new opportunities appear, the world takes on new colors. Therefore, do not give in to your fears, accept them as a gift of fate, as an opportunity to become better.

Look into the eyes of what you are afraid of - and become a new person!

Fear... You don't know how, when and why it took over your mind. Since then, your life has become painful. You cannot free your mind from negative thoughts, fear follows you everywhere. He lives in you, in your head. He is always with you. You would like to forget about him more than anything in the world, but you don’t know how to get rid of the feeling of fear and anxiety for yourself or someone close, how to get rid of constant panic fear in anticipation of something terrible. You are tense, tormented, exhausted ...

And those nightmarish intrusive thoughts that create images in your mind that scare you more than anything in the world? From these thoughts, a cold sweat appears on the body, you are ready to lose consciousness. Better to die than think about it. But the thought is material, you remember this and are ready to kill yourself so that your terrible thoughts do not materialize, so that this nightmare from your head does not bring real harm to anyone. You resist these thoughts with all the strength of your consciousness, conduct meditations to get rid of fear - no, you will not think about it, you will not allow yourself! But from this you only enter into colossal tension, unpleasant, painful - even your body begins to hurt from this mental heat. And your terrible obsessive thoughts - they climb into your consciousness with even greater force. How to get rid of bad obsessive thoughts and fears? After all, there must be some way, it cannot be that it does not exist!

How to get rid of fear of people, men, darkness, dogs... Fear takes on any guise

You know well what fear is - it is your longtime companion. He has been with you since childhood. Fear of the dark, chilling the child's soul. Fear of losing parents, fear of death. It's so scary to know from childhood that death exists and you have to die. Excruciatingly scary. You're so used to fear that you feel like it's part of you. Therefore, you have no idea how you can get rid of inner fear and insecurity forever.

But what is happening now is unbearable! You can't live like this...

Yes, fear has always been with you, it only changed its appearance. Or didn't change. The main thing for him is to live in your head under any pretext. You can be afraid of heights, water, snakes, insects, dogs - he doesn't care by and large. You may seem funny to other people when you are afraid of germs on public transport. And you are not at all funny - there are so many diseases in the world that you can catch! And to get sick for a long time, and to die painfully ... You don’t know how to get rid of excitement and fears in life, so you follow their lead. Do not hold hands on the handrails in the minibus, carry antibacterial wipes with you. Wash your hands a thousand times a day.

By the way, about diseases. Who will tell you how to get rid of the fear of getting sick? Sometimes you feel like you're sick. It has happened so often in your life. You carefully monitor your body, your state of health ... And suddenly you see that something has changed. You look for information about this on the Internet and find confirmation: yes, you are sick. Seriously. Looks like your song has been sung. How terrible it is to get sick at such an early age! You are only 20 (30, 40, 50…). Become disabled, lose health, and even worse - die after a hard struggle for life. And how you are afraid of pain, torment, of all that you have to go through - you are afraid of pain in your heart. To tears. You can't sleep at night, you're so afraid.

You have already prepared for the worst, bought everything you need to take with you to the hospital and ... the doctors did not confirm your diagnosis. They didn't find anything. You can't believe it and you go to other doctors! But even there they tell you that you are perfectly healthy! You cry with happiness, because you will not die and become disabled! But… what was it? Hypochondria is one of the guises of your old friend FEAR. I would like to understand how to get rid of the fear of illness and pain, but what about diseases - how to get rid of all fears ...

A painful question: how to get rid of fears and complexes?

No matter what happens in your life, fear always makes its own adjustments. Even beautiful events are overshadowed by fear. For example, you are afraid of losing something. Something or someone.

If you are in love, and even mutually, and even happy, this happiness does not last long. Fear drags into your mind the idea that your beloved (beloved) can stop loving you, leave you or cheat on you with another (other). Your fear helpfully draws pictures in your imagination, painful pictures of betrayal. There she (he) is with another, and it seems to you that in fact her (his) behavior is suspicious. She (he) pays little attention to you, at least less than before. Did you fall in love (fall out of love)? You are tormented by jealousy, suspicion, fear of being abandoned. You roll up scenes of jealousy, sort things out, and your beloved (beloved) looks at you with round eyes in surprise and says that you have no reason for jealousy.

You see that you yourself, with your own hands, are gradually destroying your wonderful relationships, making them sick and painful. You are destroying your great love. And it’s always like this: at first you don’t know how to get rid of the fear of approaching, then how to get rid of the fear of betrayal, and there is no end to this ... Fear guides you all the time, lives you, screams at you, hysterias you, is jealous of you ...

Fear keeps you from living. He brings suffering to you and your loved ones. Get rid of fear! Make him leave your mind forever. Because it's possible.

System-vector psychology. How to get rid of fear and phobias

So, what is the technique of getting rid of fear?

Yuri Burlan's systemic psychoanalysis helps to get rid of fears forever. Many people have already used this method and got excellent and stable results, got rid of a variety of bad conditions, including phobias, obsessive fears, panic attacks.

How it works?

System-vector psychology is the science of vectors, innate desires and mental properties for their realization, which are marked on the human body by erogenous zones. If a person is not aware of his true, innate desires, he does not realize them. Then the vectors (that is, the mental, hidden in the unconscious) are not filled, and the person experiences bad states.

You can try systemic psychoanalysis in action for free at the introductory online lectures "Systemic Vector Psychology". To register for the training, go to .

Proofreader: Galina Rzhannikova

The article was written based on the materials of the training " System-Vector Psychology»