Da Love-Ananda: Seven stages of life! (for those who like to classify everything). Stages of true love in a relationship and their characteristics 7 stages of love development

As a rule, relationships begin with falling in love. When a man and a woman are fascinated by each other, immersed in passion, feelings, romance. Candy-bouquet period due to

1. Falling in love (attraction stage)

2.Addiction (stage of saturation, then satiety)

3. Quarrels (disgust stage)

4.Patience

5.Service

6.Friendship

7.Love

And now more details.

1. As a rule, relationships begin with falling in love. When a man and a woman are fascinated by each other, immersed in passion, feelings, romance. Candy-bouquet period due to hormonal levels. And it usually lasts from 3 months to 2 years.

2. Next comes the habituation stage. When romantic relationships have reached their peak and become commonplace. Saturation stage. And then satiety. This relationship is reminiscent of the weather before a thunderstorm: everything is suspiciously quiet, calm, but there is already a smell of storm in the air.

3. Quarrels. Disgust stage. The conflict has matured and is manifesting itself openly.

These three points describe one of the most common scenarios for relationship development. (attraction) - (saturation, satiety) - (disgust). At the stage of quarrels, people separate in the hope that they will have better luck with another partner. But as a rule, the situation repeats itself.

4. Patience. At this stage, people understand that they must endure the conflict. The stage of quarrels passes, the relationship seems to be renewed. A new round begins. Again falling in love, addiction, quarrels, patience and... a new round.

This is another possible scenario for the development of relations. Now they can be longer. Partners already know that quarrels are just a certain stage, after which there will be a new round of relationships. Such couples either break up when the resource of patience runs out, or they have a desire to find a real stable platform for harmonious relationships. Then they can move up to the next level.

5. Service. This is a radically different approach to developing relationships. In fact, only from this stage do we begin to approach the concept of “love”. If at the previous stages the motives were quite egocentric, then here the idea appears to serve the partner, to act to satisfy him.

6. The next stage in the development of relationships is friendship. It builds on the previous one, on service; when a couple accumulates a “bank of trust” and gratitude.

7. LOVE! At the end of this long and difficult journey, the couple receives a well-deserved reward - true love, which no longer stops or weakens over time, but only increases.

It is believed that going through all seven stages can take about 12 years or more.

Neurogenetic technological stage: Mental passivity. Self-determination of the user of labor tools. Laryngeal-manual distinction. Receptive mind.

Phylogenetic stage: Ape-man. Imitative - (pre-semantic) use of symbols. Hunter-gatherer.

Ontogenetic stage: A child who learns to manipulate the muscles of the larynx and hands and imitate imprinted symbols.

Installation: Approval, imitation, capture for the sake of manipulation.

Zodiac: Virgo I, Apprentice.

Greco-Roman deities: Artemis (Diana), Narcissus, Hyacinth.

Hebrew letter: Zain

Created reality: Hunter-gatherer use of ready-made objects and shelters.

Ecological niche (species): Cave dwellings.

Ecological niche (individual): Areas designated by adults for children to play and learn.

The seventh stage is receptive, obedient, efficient, organized, timid, naive, inhibited. Mental virgins look up, awaiting instructions. Focus on symbols and artifacts. Imitation. The laryngeal-manual imprint is accepted or rejected, internalized and repeated.

There is no inventive manipulation or creative fusion of symbols here.

Map Lovers is a tactful, humorous and metaphorical message from DNA that your nervous system still contains circuits that were first activated in the Paleolithic era and used by you when you first learned to imitate and mindlessly repeat symbols - to say the right words to get something , what do you want.

Lovers pre-pubescent (Virgo I) symbolize the passive-receptive-imitative use of symbols and artifacts. Imitative use of vocal cords and right hand. Making distinctions without first thinking is a superstitious ritual. After all, magic is built on the use of energies whose meaning you do not understand. At the species level this is Paleolithic the stage of silent and submissive use of stones and words. At the individual level, it is a five-year-old child learning to babble, read and manipulate - without understanding the semantic origins of symbols. Self-determination in terms of the imprinted cognitive ant structure - learning how to become an intelligent member of the Ant Hill.

This Brain (which became active in the Lower Paleolithic) is still wired into your nervous system, activating whenever you use symbols or artifacts with childlike seriousness in a “conventional” way.

Lovers represent the passive phase of the Third Circuit, the left hemisphere of the brain, learning to distinguish, distribute, differentiate, and imitate linguistic-manual symbols. Throwing away the veil of gross perception, the larynx and right hand learn to select, contract, and grasp abstract details. This contour appears during the period when the child begins to speak and manipulate the right hand. Third Childhood. Student.

Installation sphincteral - opening and contraction (constriction), passive focus, imitation, imitation.

The seventh brain is the first mental stage. Imitative, passive, obsessed with magic, trusting and not questioning anything. Communication and thought processes are mechanical and endlessly repetitive. A, B, C, D, E, F. One, two, three. This parrot's use of symbols is inherently magical and ritualistic. The seventh brain is focused on the repetition of symbols. The style, order and classification of characters are exactly copied. Hence the familiar "Maiden" overload with details. Paleolithic man uses the tools handed down from his ancestors in the same way as they used them. Or passively examines the dry river bottom and boxes of children's toys in search of already created tools. He is not yet a creator of tools, not a user of fire. This is the hunting-gathering period. Caves, not built dwellings. Findings, not making.

When a child finds out that the world is “packaged” and “labeled,” a period of submissive, diligent, and repeated verbal-symbolic imitation begins. The chaos of complex feelings must be divided and sorted out. What This? While your nervous system is evolving through this phase to a more active, creative, inventive thought process, some individuals who are genetically programmed (a structural caste called Virgo) and/or exposed (during imprint vulnerability) to a disciplined authoritarian environment will internalize this passive submissive style as a survival device and social role. The key to this stage is imitation of symbolic manipulation.

This Tarot card is identified with soft, methodical and efficient people. They are diligent and prone to introspection. Often anxious and slightly obsessive or restless. Their main problem is the constant need to systematize information received every second. Such people are capable of performing boring tasks. They are dependent, fastidious, demanding, fussy, dogmatic in categories, neat and always irritated by people and events that do not fit neat classifications. Thorough, corrosive literati, often falling into melancholy and feeling tired due to the unreliability of the energy flow, which does not always remain intense at the proper level. Reasonable, limited by logic and rules, critical, painstaking, practical, punctual, seriously dedicated and enthusiastic, diligent, reliable, picky, modest. They are well-intentioned moralists, superstitious in their mania to follow ritual.

A child of three to five years is not yet a representative of the species Homo sapiens. This is the larval form of a human. Let's have no illusions. At five years old we were primitive people of the Stone Age, dull-witted, although skillfully imitating primates. Hunter-gatherers.

As the growing child masters the reality of social primates, the following metamorphosis occurs. At approximately the age of three to five years, the left hemisphere of our cerebral cortex actively comes into play and creates two new neurophysiological technologies. We learn to dexterously manipulate the thumb and forefinger of both hands. We learn to operate the nine muscles of our larynx. This is how we become symbol-operating humanoids. Magic rituals require precision reproduction.

This perfection mindset leads to emotional disconnection. This is the timid stage, fearful of connection, passion or dependence. Cool, self-controlled, self-absorbed, internally disciplined. Mentally restrained and obedient to authority.

This stage is characterized by the first primitive use of symbols and artifacts. The Paleolithic man and the modern Virgo city dweller operate with symbols in a repetitive manner. This is not a rational, but a magical approach. Virgo I am convinced that survival is achieved as a result of pronouncing the right words and mechanically performing rituals. Hence the reliance on rules and traditional actions. Most modern people never rise above this passive stage of symbolic manipulation. This is the True Believer, the obedient “repeater” of religious, political or racist slogans. Individuals of the seventh stage are irritated and frightened by the attempts of the intellect of the eighth stage to verify or revise the semantic reality of symbols.

The young man in this Tarot card looks passively at the young woman, and she, in turn, passively looks at the angel. The main idea is receptivity and learning. Follow instructions. The first stage of the Third Circuit. Older decks depict a man making a choice between two women. Cavendish in his book "Tarot" says that this card has many meanings: love and innocence, temptation, free will, choice, but it also symbolizes the unity of opposites. The element of choice is primary: it depicts the power of the symbolic mind to make distinctions.

When you look at the bride and groom, your heart rejoices. The lovers cannot take their eyes off each other, they are happy and it seems to them that this will always continue. I can’t even wrap my head around what could be different. But, unfortunately, the truth of life sometimes goes against these expectations. After just a couple of years (and sometimes even less) of living together, for some couples, tender feelings give way to scandals, reproaches and mutual accusations. Why is this happening? How can these two, who recently sincerely loved each other, say such terrible words to their chosen one? Where did that wonderful feeling that seemed endless like the Universe go? Can a relationship even last a lifetime?

The relationship between a man and a woman is a journey that they take together. Whether it will be long or short, interesting or banal depends on the two of them. We can also say that relationships are a process, and like any process they have their own stages or stages. It is these stages of relationship development that I propose to talk about.

I came across different versions that distinguished from three to nine levels of relationships, but what interested me most was the system originating in Vedic texts, which correlates very well with modern family psychology.

Before moving on to considering these stages of relationship development, it is worth noting that partners do not always go through them synchronously: one, for example, may already be ready for the fifth stage, while the other is stuck at the third. The time it takes to complete this entire cycle can also vary greatly, but it usually takes at least 7 years to reach the final stages.

1. Falling in love

Yes Yes. This is precisely the period about which so many poems have been written, countless songs sung, and many films made. A person in love literally loses his head from the feelings that wash over him, it’s as if wings grow behind his back, and it seems that gravity is barely holding him in the material world. “Darling, I will give you this star.” But scientists look at what inspires creative people with skepticism. “It’s all about physiology,” they say. Harvard professor Helen Fisher examined lovers using a tomograph and came to the following conclusion.

The brain of a person in love intensely secretes certain hormones that are responsible for feelings of pleasure and euphoria. But negative emotions and rational thinking are blocked. Particularly high activity was observed in those areas of the brain that are responsible for desires, motivation, attraction and addiction. And here’s what’s interesting: these zones react with the same force to cocaine! The brain activity of a lover and the brain of a person who has taken this drug look very similar.

The state of such “chemical love” or ardent love lasts 12-18 months. If this period had continued longer, the body would have suffered from exhaustion, nervous and physical. It has been noted that many lovers actually noticeably lose weight.

From a psychological point of view, the following happens. A man and a woman, struck by Cupid's arrow, discover each other and experience a strong attraction. It is like eating an amazing and still unknown fruit. You want to feel the taste again, again and again. Therefore, this stage is also called the saturation stage.

2. Stage of satiety

But any taste, even the most beautiful, cannot always be new. Gradually we begin to get used to it and become fed up with it. Once your loved one starts living with you, this stage is just around the corner. For some, this may take a year, while for others, a few months are enough. A state of long-term love can persist when a certain distance in communication is maintained. Hence, long-term romantic relationships that develop at a distance through correspondence or rare meetings. When people begin to live together, they gradually begin to notice in their chosen one not only advantages, but also disadvantages, of which there are not so few.

3. Rejection

The state of rejection occurs when the “chemistry of love” no longer works. The rose-colored glasses evaporate, and the person begins to doubt his partner and wonder if he was too hasty in his choice. This is where quarrels and showdowns begin. In fact, there are only two options here: learn to accept your partner with all his shortcomings and move to a new stage of the relationship, or take the “warpath”, unsuccessfully trying to remake the other person for yourself. For many couples, this stage results in complete disappointment in the chosen one and a break in the relationship. At this stage, people often begin to think that they have chosen the wrong partner. It seems that with another person everything would have turned out differently. They break off old relationships, start new ones, but as soon as they reach the same stage they again feel disappointed and are again ready to set out on the search for an “ideal relationship.” If you fail to move to a new level, then such walking in circles can continue throughout your life.

4.Patience

In a traditional society, religious and cultural traditions contribute to the preservation of marriage, but in modern society they are greatly weakened. Understanding and working on oneself can help a modern person get through this difficult stage. Many intuitively understand this and it is during this period that they most often seek advice from a psychologist, read specialized literature, and attend seminars. The crisis of the third year of marriage often coincides with the third or fourth stage; this is the very moment when the love boat crashes into everyday life. You can observe the following picture: by the beginning of the fourth stage, many already have a child, the woman transfers almost all her attention to him. Relationships become much more casual. But since now there are new common goals, property, children, it is impossible to follow only emotions and desires. Therefore we have to endure. But the task of this period is not at all to endure the hardships of living together with clenched teeth. If you do this, then such patience may sooner or later burst, or the moment will come when the children grow up. Then the old problem will rear its head again and the couple will feel that the “glue” that kept them together all these years has disappeared, and they again find themselves faced with an unresolved situation: what should they do with each other next. The task of this period is completely different. Tolerance towards one's neighbor is the germ of wisdom and true love. This is a step that helps to overcome selfishness, accept the individuality of another person and understand that “if you want to change something, start with yourself.” If you know how to respect not only your own opinions and desires, but also the needs of your partner, and see in him an individuality, and not dough for sculpting your ideal, congratulations, you are nearing the end of this stage. During this period, there are also quarrels, but they are already manageable, and there is an understanding that the sun will appear again from behind the clouds after a while.

“Very few people know what love is. Ninety-nine percent of people, unfortunately, think that sexuality is love. But that's not true. Sexuality, passion is very animal, it undoubtedly has the ability to develop into love, but this is not real love, but only a possibility” Osho Zen Tarot. VI lasso

5. Service

In fact, only from this stage do we begin to approach the concept of “Love”. At the beginning of the development of a relationship, it may seem that lovers have already achieved it and can selflessly and joyfully do something for their partner. But whether this is really true can only be understood after some time, when the “chemistry of love” subsides and a person’s actions begin to be guided by his true beliefs, and not by endorphins. If at the previous stages the motives were quite egocentric, then here the other person is perceived not as a source of pleasure, but as an object of service. If we want someone to fulfill your desires, this may not be part of the other person's plans, but if we ourselves show a willingness to serve the other person, then he is unlikely to refuse. And over time, perhaps he will have a sincere desire to answer you in kind. In the east, the tradition is still alive, where most people understand that love will not appear out of the blue, it must be cultivated, it must be earned.

6. Respect

This is the result of the previous stage. People already know each other well; they have gone through many life trials together. Partners have learned to do what is pleasant and necessary for each other, without demanding anything in return. The couple accumulates a “bank of trust” and gratitude. Partners can easily exchange energy, thoughts and feelings.

7. Love

This is the long-awaited fruit that has ripened as a result of patience, understanding and caring for each other. The couple understands each other perfectly and experiences great pleasure when communicating. This is a real spiritual achievement and only very few people reach this level. As we mature, we can begin to experience love that goes beyond attraction and respects the unique individuality of another person. We begin to realize that our partner often acts as a mirror, reflecting unseen aspects of our true selves and helping us become more whole.

And it seems to me that the words of the Apostle Paul are dedicated to precisely this kind of love: “Love endures for a long time, is merciful, love does not envy, love does not exalt itself, is not proud, does not act rudely, does not seek its own, is not irritated, does not think evil, does not rejoice in unrighteousness, but rejoices with the truth; covers all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends".

If I had never in my life seen specific examples confirming the truth of these words, I would have decided that everything written above is just another beautiful theory. But several times in my life I had the opportunity to meet couples who, already at a very advanced age, were walking arm in arm along a park alley or riding on the subway. And there was something in their faces and eyes that immediately made them stand out from the crowd; they shone with peace and quiet happiness. They told each other something, smiled and seemed to notice no one around except each other.

True Love is not a random gift of fate, but a reward for efforts, the desire to overcome difficulties and great work on oneself.

In general, you should live your life like this:

All people dream of finding true love, which they can carry throughout their lives. Even materialists and rational individuals want sincere and long-term relationships. But experts in the field of psychology say that before creating a strong family union, it is necessary to overcome 7 stages of love. Each of these stages has its own characteristic features. The seven stages of relationship development are described in detail in the sections of the article.

Relevance of the problem

Love is a feeling that people have experienced at all times, from ancient times to the present day.

It is spoken about in philosophical and religious sources and in art. Experts in the field of psychological science pay a lot of attention to the study of this phenomenon. Even in ancient times, people noticed that a deep feeling is not born immediately. Ancient texts talk about 7 stages of love. All men and women who are in a relationship go through similar stages. However, in many cases, partners separate without overcoming the difficulties that arose in the process of living together. The breakup occurs before the time when all the steps leading to a real, strong feeling have been completed. Many books and articles have been written about the stages of love, psychology and the features of this phenomenon. Reading such literature allows you to better understand not only your partner, but also yourself.

Why is it important to go through all the steps and tests?

It is difficult to disagree with the fact that it is very pleasant to look at the bride and groom on the day the marriage is officially formalized. The partners’ faces glow with happiness, they look at each other with eyes full of admiration and tenderness. Those around them do not even suspect that after a few years, and perhaps months of living together, these people will quarrel and insult each other, and experience mutual hostility. In many cases this is exactly what happens. What caused such a drastic change in relations? The point is that true love does not appear suddenly. It develops gradually. In order for the feeling to be strong and sincere, partners need to show tolerance and wisdom, as well as overcome many challenges along their life path. Only after going through all 7 stages of love can we say that a person and his significant other have found true family happiness.

Necessary steps

Before looking at each phase individually, it should be noted that both partners do not always arrive at a certain stage at the same time. In addition, the time to overcome the entire cycle may vary depending on the characteristics of a particular couple and the relationship between a man and a woman. However, experts say that most families reach the last stage after no less than seven years of marriage. So, there are 7 stages of love:

1. Love.
2. Addiction.
3. Rejection.
4. Patience.
5. Service.
6. Respect.
7. True and deep feeling.

Each of these steps is described in detail in the following sections.

Condition caused by hormone activity

Many famous works are devoted to this period, which is present in the relationship of any couple. A person who is in love is in the grip of strong emotions. Certain substances that his brain produces provide a feeling of euphoria. The individual is unable to think rationally and evaluate his partner. All that a person feels during this period is admiration, adoration and the desire to spend as much time as possible next to the other half.

Scientists compare the effect of hormones on the nervous system when falling in love with the effect of drugs. Naturally, such a period passes quickly. Experts say that its duration varies from 12 to 18 months. Sometimes, due to circumstances or the desire of partners to increase the time of falling in love, it is delayed. In this case, people do not start a life together, but limit themselves to infrequent meetings, telephone communication, and correspondence. If the relationship continues to develop, the second phase of the seven stages of love begins. The next section of the article is devoted to a description of this stage.

addictive

For several months, the partners enjoy each other's company, like a person who cannot get enough of the taste of delicious food. But even the most beautiful dish becomes boring over time. The same thing happens with feelings. The first stage of a relationship cannot last long, because this condition can lead to physical and mental exhaustion. It is known that many lovers are prone to significant weight loss. Partners who begin life together move to the next stage - addiction. This is the second phase of the 7 stages of love. A person begins to notice not only the advantages of the other half, but also the disadvantages. Moreover, negative qualities are more striking than positive ones.

Rejection

This is the name of a condition in which partners begin to doubt their choice of a life partner. At this stage, disputes often arise, people are engaged in sorting things out.

This is the third stage of love out of 7 stages. It is considered the most difficult. Many family unions cannot overcome this stage and fall apart. Why is this happening? The reason is that people try to subjugate their partners and are not tolerant of their views, personal characteristics and shortcomings. Some start new families, but face similar problems. After all, if you do not show tolerance towards a loved one, you cannot achieve true love.

Patience phase

This stage is reached only by those couples in which the partners work on their shortcomings. Most families reach this stage only after 3-4 years of marriage. This stage is often timed to coincide with the birth of the child.

A woman devotes a lot of time to her baby. Relationships between partners become more ordinary. They have joint property. Stormy quarrels are no longer acceptable. Therefore, the task of this stage is to learn to be tolerant. But this does not mean that you have to endure everything in silence. After all, sooner or later the spouses will not have enough endurance. Or the children will grow up, and the partners will understand that nothing binds them anymore. Tolerance is to accept another with all his desires and characteristics. If spouses successfully pass this stage, they understand that they are able to overcome differences through peaceful negotiations, avoiding quarrels and insults.

Service

This phase is characterized by the fact that a man and a woman can do something for each other without demanding anything in return.

Moreover, this does not happen as a result of falling in love and the influence of hormones, but due to the presence of a sincere, conscious desire to help the spouse. A person serves his soulmate without expecting gratitude or being reciprocated in kind.

This phase is the fifth of the 7 stages of love. The next level that partners reach is respect.

Sixth stage

At this stage, the partners already know each other very well; they have had to face many difficulties throughout their life together. The couple learned selfless help and tolerance. At this stage, a feeling of gratitude and trust comes to the other half. Partners communicate easily and openly express their views and emotions.

Final stage

At this stage, true love appears. It is born as a result of long work: work on one’s personality, tolerance, establishing mutual understanding, trusting relationships. Couples who reach this stage experience real pleasure from communicating with each other. Spouses come to the realization that love is the feeling with which they can improve themselves. It is not given to people just like that. This is the result of joint efforts. This goal can be achieved only after going through the 7 stages of love:

1. Love.
2. Addiction.
3. Rejection.
4. Patience.
5. Service.
6. Respect.
7. True and deep feeling.

Features of building relationships among the stronger sex

Many women are interested in how to behave with a young man at the beginning of a romantic relationship. And this is no coincidence. Knowing about the 7 stages of male love, you can understand how representatives of the stronger sex show their feelings and how they build relationships. So, the steps that a young man goes through during communication with a girl include:

1. Sympathy. At this stage, a man is more interested in a woman’s external merits than in her character traits and level of intelligence. Moreover, each representative of the stronger sex has his own preferences regarding how a beautiful girl should look.
2. First attempts at courtship. This is the second of the 7 stages of a man's love. However, this stage does not mean the presence of feeling. A young man only looks closely at a girl, sometimes not even one, but several at the same time. If a representative of the fairer sex does not respond to courtship and does not show interest, he does not consider her a promising option.
3. To attract attention. This stage concerns the woman who shows by her demeanor that she is attracted to this particular man. A representative of the fair sex begins to develop a relationship with such a girl. Communication moves into the next phase.
4. Long-term courtship. This is the stage of dates, gifts and pleasant little things that make women so happy. A man tries to create a good impression of himself.
5. Conquest. Now the representative of the stronger sex is trying to earn a sincere feeling of love. At this stage, young people prove to girls that they are ready for a serious relationship.
6. Solution. This phase is characterized by the fact that the woman openly expresses her affection for her partner and desire to be with him, and the man reciprocates her feelings. However, deep down in his soul, the young man begins to doubt the correctness of his choice. A representative of the stronger sex asks himself questions about whether he is ready to start a family soon.
7. Love. If a man still decides that he made the right choice, he continues the relationship. It can be argued that his feeling is true. A young man takes care of his girlfriend, shows tenderness and affection.

conclusions

It can be argued that the development of relationships in each couple occurs according to an individual scenario. It is determined by the nature of the partners and external circumstances. However, there are a number of laws that can be traced in the life together of most people. Having an idea of ​​how the 7 stages of love go, you can effectively work on relationships in a couple and more adequately assess your behavior and the actions of your chosen one.

We can know or Comprehend what is only through self-understanding, which becomes not just self-information, but also self-transcendence, self-transcendence. Therefore, we must first become capable (through self-understanding and self-transcendence) of self-mastery, of free participation in what matters to us, despite self-deprecation.

I am not simply proposing the idea of ​​God, or the soul, or the Beyond. Such an idea and such a proposal cannot, in fact, be accepted by the separated mind and the separating Ego. Therefore, the ideas of that religion that appeals to the Ego and to the culture of self-detached scientism based on the idea of ​​the Ego are fundamentally false and represent nothing more than a painful and inevitably futile desire for love, well-being and illusory happiness. On the contrary, I propose self-observation, real self-understanding and real self-transcendence. And on the Path of self-transcendence, as the degree and reciprocity of participation increases, Divine, unlimited, eternal, transcendental Happiness is revealed.

The model, or outline, of the seven stages of life provides a framework into which we can realistically relate ourselves, our growing pains and spiritual aspirations, and all the information about spiritual teachings and experiences that is available to man today. Thus, the seven stages are a means to “calibrate” our human and spiritual growth, free from the prejudices and taboos of conventional society, which seeks to support and even impose many false views, thereby blocking our path to Comprehension of the truth of Divine Being.

As one becomes acquainted with the teachings of Master Yes, it becomes more and more clear that he is the Spiritual Godfather, the one who has “traversed the Path,” the “Living Stream” for prepared seekers. When individual consciousness, placed on the foundation of self-understanding, connects with “beauty” or the Power of Spiritual Bliss, a person passes through all the hierarchies of illusions - earthly (dense) and cosmic (subtle), which represent the structures of knowledge and experience. Thus, the seven stages of life can be considered as a spiritual school in which we go through seven different lessons regarding self-transcendence. When we complete the course of self-observation, self-understanding and self-transcendence, passing through all aspects of the first six stages of life, then the adept who is the Master of this school opens a hidden "door" leading through the sacred space, requiring complete self-initiation, to the complete Realization of the Divine Being.

STAGE 1
(from one year to seven years)

The first stage of life, covering the period from conception and birth to 7 years of age, is the stage of individual vital-physical adaptation of a person to the world in which he was born. In the first stage, the human being masters "simple" skills such as focusing the eyes, grasping and manipulating objects, walking, talking, and eating and digesting food. The body learns to convert breathing and food into energy, control the bladder and intestines; only minimal attention is paid to conceptual thinking and relationships with others.

STAGE 2
(from seven to fourteen years)

In the second stage, the development, integration and coordination of the emotional-sexual sphere and feelings of the human being with the growing physical body occurs. In a person’s personality, awareness of oneself as a social being and attention to one’s environment grows; Various aspects of relationships with other people become significant. Just as in the first stage we learn to control our body, absorb and assimilate elemental food, in the second stage we must similarly master and adapt to a new dimension of nutrition and support. When breathing is combined with emotions and bodily relaxation, we begin to feel the Universal Flow of Life Energy permeating our body and our whole life. In the second stage of life, we learn to relate to each other and “line up” the body, emotions, sensations and breath as a functional realization of ourselves in our relationships and in love. In this way we learn to transcend emotional reactions, neurotic tendencies and destructive manifestations, both in ourselves and in others.

It is necessary to understand that emotional and sexual growth in the second stage of life is, first of all, the development of all hormonal systems of the body. "Sexual communication", or the yoga of sexual love, becomes really important for the individual only when, as a result of the completion of the first three stages of life - the stages associated with the manifestation of love on the vital level - harmony and responsibility arise and the person awakens to the dimension of the Heart, to the fourth stage of life (described below).

STAGE 3
(from fifteen children to twenty-one years)

The third stage is the stage of development of thinking, mind and will, as well as the integration of vital-physical, emotional-sexual and mental-intentional functions. This stage marks the transition to real human autonomy, in which the first two stages of life are adapted to practical needs, with which the analytical mind and conscious will, or intention, are correlated; here a person takes responsibility for his life and controls his vitality.

This third stage is not in itself the end or completion of man's growth and fulfillment of his potential. In reality, it only means the awakening of the self-aware mind, the development of an individualistic attitude and personal motivation. A person at this stage of life is still not a person. He only brings individual force and form into the vital sphere and into the world of his experience. It moderates and at the same time expands the scope of biological needs for food and sex through the processes of verbal and analytical thinking. A person at the third stage is characterized by madness of mind - madness of problems and their solutions. Truly human existence arises only at the fourth stage of life, where the vital, elemental, emotional-sexual and lower mental functions are summed up and united by the heart - the soul (psyche), which brings integrity to all bodily existence. Thus the moral and spiritual foundations are awakened, in which Truth becomes the Principle of consciousness, and the growth of higher structures becomes possible, unhindered and beneficial. Thus, the law of truly human existence is established on the basis of an integral individuality, an integral human body-mind, through love as the most important intuition of the Divine Reality. Human sacred space is the spiritual practice of love and intuition of the Real in all life experiences; further growth occurs on its basis.

The first three stages can generally be associated with the first twenty-one years of life (three periods of seven years), but the last four stages (which take a person beyond all basic structures and functions) cannot fit into specific time limits, whatever they may be. were. Each stage is associated with a process of adaptation (or readaptation) to a specific functional point of view associated with the totality of experience.

The fourth stage, like all subsequent ones, cannot be considered within a fixed period of time. The duration of the higher stages of life depends entirely on the individual qualities and spiritual practice of a person aimed at self-transcendence.

The fourth stage of life marks the beginning of truly human existence. At this stage, the deepest soul of our being awakens, which begins to resonate with the Spirit or “Living Stream”, as Master Yes calls it, “the Great One Divine Reality”. This fourth stage is the stage of “free religion”, the stage of “surrender and adaptation of the whole body to universal life through Love-Community (which, with its pure energy, determines the position of the heart or deep soul).”

Carrying out the physical, emotional, mental and moral responsibilities of the first three stages of life creates the necessary foundation for the transformation that inevitably accompanies an authentic spiritual life. Without this basis we may, for example, enter into and enjoy yogic and mystical experiences, but find ourselves unable to be free, understanding and loving in the ordinary conditions of human existence. If the elementary functions of our bodily, mental and emotional adaptation to life are not completed and experienced during the first twenty-one years of our life, then we, being egoistically limited, “get stuck” in the lower stages. We must inevitably submit to the wisdom of self-transcendence.

However, the growth and maturation of that inner being, which is beyond the mechanical structures of the first three stages of life, is not the result of the generally understood process of change in man over time, as "we grow older and wiser." In reality, individual entry into the fourth stage of life begins with the awakening of the “heart of the soul,” which can be recognized by the emergence of a clear perception and feeling of the Flow of Life. At this stage, the Divine Presence of the Life Force is felt as something independent of and superior to the body-mind. By cultivating a conscious relationship with this Presence, the person undertaking spiritual practice begins to experience joy and discovers the spiritual qualities of faith, love and surrender. Thus, surrender, entrusting oneself to the Living Reality, is an essential feature of the fourth stage of life. A person begins to rise above the conditioning of any conventional religious norms through, as Master Da emphasizes, “continuous and concentrated self-dedication through a heartfelt feeling - attention to the Supreme Reality.”

The fifth stage is associated with the mystical aspect of spirituality. Individual attention, distracted from the theater of external events, actions and activity, turns inward, to the subjective experiences and internal experience of the “Subtle Physiology” of the brain-mind. Mystical growth and ascent from one psychic center of the body-mind to another is determined by the quality of the functioning of the nervous system. The experience of this stage reaches its peak in a state of "conditioned nirvikalpa samadhi", or formless ecstasy. Completion of this stage means that the individual has transcended his attachment to mental forms and images. Master Yes explains:

At the fifth stage - the stage of yogic mysticism - attention turns to the nuances of subtle inner experience, or to the Heaven of intimate knowledge. But Freedom in God is not achieved at this stage and by similar means. In order for the Flow of Life to overcome the division between body-mind and Infinity, the movement of attention and the illusion of an independent conscious soul (self) must be dissolved in the true Soul (or Self).

The highest peak of ascent is called “nirvikalpa samadhi,” or complete absorption of self-consciousness in the Shining Transcendent Consciousness. But in reality, even in this Absorption of attention, the seed of separation, the separated Self, remains. Attention still extends to areas outside the heart, or the root of self-awareness; it is like a movement of attention towards an independent object, and therefore, although such samadhi is not just a temporary phenomenon, it remains a form of subject-object contemplation.

The sixth stage of life is “the stage of the actual death of the Ego or the transcendence of the mind, any sense of “I” and “primary fear.” It marks the transition from the “esoteric meditation” (subject-object contemplation) of the fifth stage to the transcendence of attention and thus to transcending the sense of being a subject (consciousness conditioned by the Ego) opposed to an object (the world in all its aspects and all kinds of relationships). This is Awakening to the Transcendental Consciousness. The spiritual practice of the sixth stage of life is the deepening of the sense of identity with consciousness until this feeling becomes more significant than attention directed to objects.

With the help of the Transmission of Grace from the Spiritual Master, a living feeling of the Flow of Bliss awakens in the "immeasurable space in the right side of the heart." It is with this place to the right of the heart that the “Shining Transcendental Consciousness, which is experienced as impulses of life at the level of a single body-mind,” is associated. Master Da describes this "Space" as the "Abode of Happiness", or as the door leading to the Divine Presence of the Radiant Transcendent Consciousness, the seventh stage of life. Master Da Free John explains:

The sixth stage is the last in a series of stages preceding the Transcendental Awakening. This is the main stage at which there is a transition from the earthly and cosmic understanding of Divine or Real existence to the understanding of the Supreme Reality as the Transcendent Reality - the Conditions and Identities of all individual existential phenomena and conditions. Therefore, here the process of self-initiation is transformed from an effort aimed at developing knowledge and experience at various levels of the psychophysical personality, to a direct effort of unconditional self-transcendence.

At the sixth stage of life, the body-mind simply relaxes in the Stream of Life, and attention (the root or foundation of the mind) turns away from the gross and subtle states and objects of the body-mind towards its own Roots, the deep Roots of the ego-consciousness (egoself), which at the same time there is both the consciousness of the “Witness” (when attention is active) and simple Consciousness (primary in relation to objects and self-determination). The end result of this is conditioned Self-realization, or the intuition of the Radiant Transcendent Being; this intuition is achieved only in the experience of “I” (self-essence), detached from all objects.

In the seventh stage of life, the liberated "individuality" recognizes all existence as a modification of the Radiant Transcendental Being.

Now the Transcendental Self no longer opposes the manifested world. On the contrary, the world is perceived as constantly arising in the Supreme Being, which is essentially indistinguishable from the Self. This final act or gesture of self-dedication is extended into infinity. Master Da summarizes the seventh stage as follows:

At the seventh stage of life, a natural and deep intuition of identity with the Shining Transcendent Being arises, the intuition of the Identity of All beings (or subjects) and the Conditions of all conditions (or objects). This intuitive identification (or radical "I"-abiding) is a direct Realization, completely different from the separative actions of any subtle, inner effort. And in this Abode, any conditions, objects or states of the body-mind are simply realized and recognized in the Shining Transcendental Being (as Its obvious and inextricably linked modifications). This is “sahaj samadhi” and it is internally free from all possible involvements, identifications and limitations or from being conditioned and constrained by the force of phenomenal manifestations. If there are no objects in it, then it is simply a Shining Transcendent Being. This is "bhava samadhi" about which nothing can truly be said, and beyond It there is No One, Nothing and Nowhere that can still be achieved.

In the teachings of Master Yes, the seven stages of life are often considered in connection with the manifestation of the Signs of Full Body Enlightenment - Transfiguration, Transformation and Translation. Completely completed, the seven stages of life become the eternally Enlightened foundation of existence, beyond death and in all subsequent incarnations. The material structure of the body-mind undergoes increasing Transfiguration into the Radiance of the Divine, and the subtle or higher mind becomes the Vessel of Transformation, while this Radiance gives rise to extraordinary powers and abilities (such as healing or psychic abilities, genius, longevity and etc.) as a spontaneous reflection of the Divine Abode. In its highest manifestation during this life, such constant Divine Presence leads to Divine Translation, or the emergence of the individual being beyond all phenomenal manifestations into the "divine realm" of radiant Life-Consciousness.

The seven stages of life show the natural stages of spiritual growth, those structures through which the evolution of human consciousness inevitably occurs from the consciousness conditioned by the Ego, received at birth, to the highest stage of God-realization. On the path of Radical Understanding taught by Master Da Lav-Ananda, awakening and awareness of all seven stages forms the foundation of life and spiritual practice through individual cultivation of Communion with the Divine through Master Da. Therefore, on such a path, growth and evolution are free from the dilemma of disappointment, unhappiness, fruitless wanderings and illusions characteristic of the first six stages of life of a person who “goes on his own” and does not use the tools and Mystical Transmission from an adept who has realized all seven stages in himself.