How to end a relationship with a married man psychology. Relationship with a married man

The simplest way to describe the karmic laws of the Universe is with one phrase known to all mankind, which says: "What you sow, you will reap."

The same rule applies in life, especially when it comes to people interfering in family relationships two: for this reason, the karma of a mistress married man always negative. Let's take a closer look at this piquant moment, because in modern world, alas, such phenomena are far from uncommon.

Lover's karma: how will this affect her future life?

We all know very well that you cannot build your happiness on someone else's grief. And even if for a while everything goes smoothly and well enough, then in the end there will come a moment when it will end. Because the karma of a person has a cumulative effect: retribution for what he has done will not come immediately, but after a while.

Many women are not too concerned about spiritual issues, entering into a relationship with a married man, it seems to them too insignificant and far-fetched. However, when the past years are already leaving their mark, a belated realization comes that, nevertheless, such things do not pass without a trace.

Usually there are two scenarios for such a karmic development of events: a woman remains forever in the form of a mistress, no one marries her, and no one truly loves her. She is forced to be content with the role of the body for sexual pleasures all her life, and over time she will inevitably find a replacement, because women, alas, do not become fresher and more beautiful over the years.

The second scenario: they still take her as a wife (sometimes a man who left his wife for a mistress), but very quickly the woman realizes that she is not the only life partner of her gentleman. It becomes clear that the man "on the side" has someone else, and yesterday's lover herself is in the place of the deceived wife.

In fact, it is impossible to say in advance which of these two karmic scenarios will fall upon you if you are dating a married man. This will only become clear with time.

However, not only esotericists speak of the inevitability of such consequences. Interestingly, even psychologists are aware of such a nuance, calling it the "mistress syndrome." This is explained simply: a woman who secretly meets a married man gives him an unspoken attitude that she is ready to play a second role and not be a primary character in his life.

A man initially perceives such a relationship as light and unobtrusive, and the mistress herself is a temporary phenomenon. She is not assigned the role of a life partner, she is not considered by a man as a potential beloved woman.

Initially, such relationships are built on the fact that both are quite satisfied. this picture: the man has a wife with whom he lives, and the mistress acts as a "girl for the night", which can be contacted as needed. That is why most unfaithful married men do not initially consider their mistresses seriously and almost none of them leave their wife.

There can be many mistresses, but the wife is almost always the one and only, and forever. And therefore, you need to be prepared for the fact that the body of a secret woman, which is the main nuance in such a relationship, will simply get bored.

But let's get back to karma. A lover in this sense is like the third negative element that destroys the integrity of the union of spouses. Many women naively believe that any blame for an affair on the side lies entirely on the shoulders of the unfaithful spouse, but this is not so.

Communication with a married man greatly affects the karma of the mistress herself. And this also applies to those cases when the woman was not aware that the man was busy. For example, if he deliberately hid it. The laws of karma are such that ignorance of certain factors does not exempt us from responsibility - in this, karmic postulates are somewhat similar to state laws.

Initially, as noted above, such a connection may not be reflected in the life of a mistress. It can last a year, two, and sometimes even longer. But then, suddenly, the moment comes when karma appears on the stage of life - fate presents an account, and it does not matter to it whether you believed in it or not.

Most mistresses, once agreeing to this role, forever remain them. In youth, it can even be convenient - you don’t need to wash your husband’s socks and cook borscht for him, and rare meetings are always full of passion. But over time, a woman gets used to a man, imbued with feelings for him, she already wants more. She is no longer satisfied with the fact that he shares a bed with his wife, that she is not the only one in his life.

It is also annoying that you have to hide and hide when a man freely walks arm in arm with his lawful wife along the street. Also, at a certain age, there is a need to become a mother, take care of someone, get married, have a permanent life partner who is always there, and not just in the evenings several times a week.

And here deferred karma often comes - men around do not see a potential wife or companion in a woman, they easily go to bed with her, but they are not going to build a relationship with her.

So it turns out that there is nothing left for her - the role of an eternal lover becomes a way of life. But there are more and more pretty young and frivolous girls around, and any man is more willing to have an affair with them than with a mature lady. Therefore, it is impossible to play such a role all your life. As a result, the woman is left completely alone.

As a retribution, another unpleasant moment awaits her - she loses the opportunity to be loved. A mistress is a person who is guided by the call of the flesh, just like a married man. Their relationship is built on a fleeting passion, on the desire to experience new feelings in bed, to diversify their sex life.

This is not a full-fledged union of two principles - male and female, there is no love and deep affection. And therefore, fate answers the same for fleeting passion and lust - a lover in men causes a desire to temporarily take possession of her body, but not take care of her for the rest of her life, and even more so, not become her life partner.

It was noted above that sometimes some of them are lucky, so to speak - a man decides to leave his lawful wife, begins to live with his mistress. But this idyll does not last long, because the mistress cannot satisfy the deeper needs of a man - he simply did not initially consider her in such a role, and therefore will never be able to.

Feeling a deep lack of something else, the husband is forced to go again in search of a woman - and then the lover herself, who has become a wife, is deceived. This is a real vicious circle that destroys the lives of both and deprives them of happiness.

What advice can you give to a woman who has decided to become the secret chosen one of a married man? First of all, think about whether this prospect suits you. And to be more precise: there is no prospect for such relations and cannot be. Even if the unfaithful spouse leaves his wife and goes to you, nothing good will come of it, you will not succeed in a full-fledged and strong family.

In addition, it is believed that if a lover becomes pregnant from a married man, then there is a high probability that she will have a girl. And the child will be doomed to an equally enviable fate - usually such girls have sexual intercourse early, they are unhappy in their personal lives, they are stubbornly unlucky in marriage and most of their lives they wander from one man to another.

Karma of a man who has a mistress: deprivation of sexual power

We must not miss the other side of the coin - a man who decided to betray. Naturally, without his active desire and consent, an affair on the side is simply impossible. And therefore, it depends on the spouse whether he will have someone “on the side” or not.

Until now, there is an opinion that the stronger sex is weaker in matters of fidelity and that it is much harder for a man not to cheat than for a woman. But this is a myth, in fact, there is no link to gender here, and everything depends only on the character, on the degree of upbringing, on the spiritual level of development.

People who are not distinguished by high intelligence are most inclined to follow the lead of primitive instincts, because this gives a certain shaky sense of the meaning of life, that it is not in vain.

A male cheater does not become such under the influence of certain factors from the outside or from the outside, he is always such. Therefore, one cannot say that “it was just a moment of weakness” or come up with another justification for oneself.

One might even argue that it is a matter of time. Usually this time comes when the first wave of passion subsides, when the spouses have been living together for a sufficient number of years. But some husbands do not hesitate to run "to the side" immediately after the wedding, while others have intrigues before it.

Of course, we all come into this world with some higher purpose. And in order to achieve it, we have to overcome many difficulties, including constantly fighting with ourselves, our weaknesses and base motives.

If a person does not know how to do this, and even indulges them, then in the end he embarks on the path of self-destruction. First of all, a cheating man naturally loses his family. Then he begins to have career problems, life difficulties and inexplicable problems that fall one after another.

After that, health often deteriorates - but not even as a result of karma, but against the background of constant stress.

As long as a man has both a wife and a mistress, he can feel unsurpassed, strong and needed. But this will not continue forever. In the end, there is always the possibility that the wife will leave, and the mistress will find a new hobby.

Since an unfaithful man actively indulges his lust, the karmic lesson deprives him of the opportunity to receive sexual pleasure. Very often, a cheating husband begins to have problems with potency, which can develop against the background of an inflammatory process or tumor, and as a result of a sexually transmitted disease.

At the same time, lovers are often plagued by hormonal disruptions and typical female problems - the cycle is irregular, often goes astray, chronic cystitis develops, cysts, adhesions, and so on are found on the ovaries. With the passage of age, diseases of the urinary-genital sphere intensify and progress.

In men who seek sensual pleasures "on the side", the work of the sexual chakra is disrupted - its dysfunction leads to the fact that a person becomes obsessed with the desire to feel more sexual pleasure and his needs for sex increase dramatically.

Against this background, there is a decrease intellectual development and spiritual growth is inhibited, also with a blocked sexual chakra, a person is not capable of deep, sincere love, which forces him to seek a replacement for these feelings in bed. From this almost always develop neurosis, depression.

Instead of aggravating this state and worsening your karma, it is worth clearing the energy body of negative energy and seek help from experts. They will not only help overcome the painful craving for betrayal and the search for new sensations, but will also convey to you the information that this does not allow you to develop either in a career or in a personal sense, since all your energy is turned into the channel of self-destruction.

A cheating man will not only have to work out his karma, to some extent he is also responsible for becoming involved in someone else's corruption - after all, it is the man who initiates secret relationships without giving them up, which worsens the karma of his mistress.

If the wife finds out about the betrayals and the existence of another woman and feels severe mental pain from this, then the man’s karma will worsen even more, since this is considered a negative action - you can’t make other people suffer.

In this case, the man will pay for everything - and for the fact that he entered into a bad relationship, and for the fact that it affected another woman and spoiled her karma, and for the mental suffering caused.

Here, one can almost certainly talk about early sexual impotence and loss of health, which will progress against the background of any negative experience. In the future, a man turns out to be useless to anyone, since he is deprived of even the primitive ability to perform sexual functions, which formed the basis of his life.

This is karmic retribution, which should make the unfaithful husband realize all his mistakes and what a useless and destructive lifestyle he led in the past.

Remember even Casanova - he smashed female hearts, ruined marriages and started affairs with such ease, as if it were ordinary entertainment for him. In the end, he lost everything - and his attractive appearance, and health, and the opportunity to indulge his base instincts.

You may notice that in those days there was no reliable contraception and now it is much easier to avoid dangerous sexually transmitted diseases. But here it is far from them - now, instead of syphilis, many are waiting for prostatitis, testicular cancer and other oncological diseases that arise in an unknown way.

There are no barriers to karma, you cannot protect yourself from it or protect yourself. Today and tomorrow you can spend your days idly, but the day after tomorrow the karmic lessons will begin to take effect.

It is not for nothing that we are given some time before we have to pay for our mistakes. It is reasonable to spend it on correcting your deeds and atoning for your guilt before the wife you deceived, improve relationships and spend time not on your mistress, but on your family.

The negative karma of a married man's mistress also arises through the fault of an unfaithful husband, and therefore he will have to pay the bills most of all. Think about this before agreeing to deceive someone who trusts you. Karma never forgives such deeds.

The first thing you need to know about a relationship with a married man is that she violates the laws of the universe, destroys someone else's family. This is a very common occurrence in our sick society.

As you know, you cannot build happiness on other people's bones. One way or another, sooner or later you will have to experience the same thing yourself, or get serious problems. Nothing happens just like that, for free, especially in this illusory world, where poison is always hidden under a beautiful candy wrapper.

Intimate relationship with a married man

I love you without the right to love ...

“The greatest force that preserves family relationships is fidelity, psychic strength. The biggest force that destroys family relationships is infidelity.” Oleg Torsunov

At one of the women's forums, I saw statistics of 245 participants: 100 once had an intimate relationship with married men, 51 are still in these relationships, the rest either were not, or consider it unacceptable. Why does every second girl bind herself in such a relationship, and how does this affect our lives?

When we ourselves are in this, it is difficult to give any advice and even more so to see the essence of the problem. We all consider ourselves wise and able to distinguish good from bad. So much information is written by us as if to ourselves: “Do not date married people - this will not lead to anything good!”

We share experiences and opinions with each other: “A man lives on two fronts. What he tells you is irrelevant. He is in no hurry to see you from his wife, and perhaps he does not even think about leaving her. This speaks volumes. You are not on an equal footing, he just needs an outlet, and if you don’t exist, another one will appear. ”

Relationship with a married man and karma

We draw a parallel and ironically call men “not original”, because all their actions are similar, like two drops of water, and even the words they say are the same. But we manage to immediately forget all the instructions, keeping the faith that this time everything will be different.

I thought for a long time about the relationship with a married man and karma, why this happens, because Vedic knowledge warns of the price that you have to pay: financial difficulties, health problems in children, working off this karma in the next life, and so on. But, apparently, these warnings in the future seem to be something distant and intangible, they cannot be compared with the sensations here and now.

However, after a certain time, understanding comes, inner maturity sets in, allowing you to look at the situation from the outside. And in my experience, I can say that in all this there are three main ideas that we are violating:

• awareness;
• the trust of the universe;
• respect and value.

Communication with a married man psychology

Awareness in connection with a married man makes me think about what I will do today for my future in psychological terms, how I change it for the better with my every act. Ruining someone's life and hoping for your own happiness is a big delusion.

Trust in the Universe: often fate itself gives signs, and in this case if a man is already busy, all the more so married to another - this is a clear sign from above that he should not be with you. Whatever feelings capture, when the candy-bouquet period ends, this understanding will come.

Everyone is different, but sometimes there is a misunderstanding why you attracted him into your life. However, you don’t want to let go either, because the habit and fear of loneliness do not allow you to see other options. To the last we hold on to the situation, devastating ourselves and others.

Respect and value lie in the fact that at all times women could support each other with communication, filling feminine energy transfer of experience. And for some reason we have become rivals who believe that by humiliating each other, you can achieve happiness.

To whom, if not to our friends, do we cry when we are abandoned or offended by our men? So why do we not appreciate our own kind in this matter?

“Treason ruins the family, at least open up, at least don’t open up. Even if she had not opened, the family would still fall apart. Because when betrayal occurs, love is lost between them. When love is lost, the person begins to shake, and he is looking for a reason. He starts looking for a problem." Oleg Torsunov

Dear readers, let's learn to appreciate and respect each other, because we can be a force that creates the world around us, or we can destroy it, starting from ourselves! Love to you, awareness and trust. Write your opinion, we will be glad to receive feedback.

Meeting a person you like can be much more difficult than just getting married, and everyone wants happiness. How difficult it is to resist the temptation when all attempts to arrange a personal life fail, and suddenly he appears in your life - attentive, caring, corresponding to your idea of ​​\u200b\u200b perfect man but unfortunately not alone. The reciprocity of feelings covers with a wave, and at this moment the phrase “You can’t build your happiness on someone else’s misfortune” seems to need to be adjusted. There is some truth in this, and indeed not everyone is happy in marriage, but now we will not dwell on the moral aspects. It is much more important to find out the true intentions of a new lover and find out what consequences a relationship with a married man can lead you to.

Decide on your own desires

Be honest with yourself about what exactly you expect from this relationship. Perhaps you are just tired of loneliness and you want new emotions. If this is the case, do not idealize your partner and do not rush things so that later you do not regret what happened and do not suffer from feelings of guilt.

If you have a clearer goal, and you intend to connect your life with this particular person, you need to get to know him better. Relationship with a married man looks attractive during the period of meetings, but everything can change radically when he leaves his wife for you. Even if he has not yet received concrete proposals from his side, for a moment imagine him as your husband and ask yourself the following questions:

• Why does he need a family? Someone marries, dreaming of the comfort and company of a beloved woman, but there are those who perceive their wife as a set of functions from a domestic point of view. If you are dealing with the second option, then high feelings and an attractive appearance are not in the first place for him, and marriage with such a person is unlikely to make you happy;
• Can he be called a responsible person? If he was disappointed in his wife almost immediately after the wedding, he was clearly not ready to create a family, but nevertheless, he decided to take this step. If he plans a joint future with you, but there are already children in his marriage, a good sign for you will be his readiness to support them financially and not lose touch with them. In this case, at least you will know that in the event of birth common child one can hope for it;
• How do you see living together? This question is the most difficult, because the information that you have is based mostly on his words. A drinker will not come on a date with his mistress drunk, and a domestic tyrant will not show character, because he cannot have domestic claims against you. A man who is financially dependent on his wife will find a way to appear successful in your eyes, so trust not an external impression, but concrete facts. Be attentive even to trifles and do not look for excuses for his actions.

Rate his behavior

Behind ardent declarations of love and promises to leave the family, there may be absolutely nothing. Communication with a married man sometimes drags on for long years, and your desire to legitimize your status in his life may remain unfulfilled. Your connection cannot be called promising if it behaves as follows:

• He speaks badly of his wife. A sane person should understand that, first of all, he criticizes not his spouse, but his own choice, and if you become his next choice, you will have about the same fate. Even if the most serious intentions can be traced on his part, such behavior speaks of his dishonesty;
• Walks away from the conversation. All your attempts to figure out how long to wait for him to take a responsible step lead to the fact that in response you hear the words you want to hear, but they are not followed by specific actions;
• Pulling time. For a long time, you hear from him that he will definitely leave his wife for you, but now is not the right moment. Typical excuses include material difficulties, the desire to mentally prepare the spouse for a break in relations, and even fictional household illnesses;
• Cares about his reputation in the eyes of his wife. If he carefully hides your relationship and worries about unnecessary questions from his wife, then he is not going to leave the family.

This behavior is common to most, but not all. There are also such men whose wives look through their fingers at their temporary hobbies and understand that he still does not dare to leave the family. There is no question of high feelings in such marriages, but material dependence on a spouse, or the usual desire to be married woman, develops not only patience, but also pushes wives to such feats, after which the mistress herself will be glad to break the connection with a married man, forgetting that she fell in love without memory.

How to behave

Of course, ideally, you want the initiative to life together followed precisely from a man, but if he hesitates with a decision, the reasons may be as follows:

• He does not intend to leave the family. Whatever actions you take, this man will not voluntarily part with his wife. If you find a way to destroy his marriage, then next to you he will be out of hopelessness, and is unlikely to be grateful to you for the initiative;
• He lacks strength of character. Such a man will eventually remain with the woman who is more interested in him, and if you turn out to be her, then you will not have to rely on a strong male shoulder.

Most effective method to get at least some certainty is to put him before a choice, refusing to meet as a mistress. It is not a fact that the decision of a loved one will please you, but at least you will no longer waste time next to someone who has no further plans for you.

What not to do

In a desperate struggle for their happiness, many girls are prone to commit rash acts that only further complicate the situation. The point here is not even in decency, but in the fact that, first of all, they harm themselves.

Common Mistakes:

• Blackmail. Your relationship with a married man is hardly known to his wife, and if you threaten that you yourself will tell her everything, this will certainly cause a negative reaction on his part;
• Conversation with his wife. This option will not bring you good luck in any scenario. If he was going to talk to her himself, then your initiative will make him very angry. If he didn’t have such intentions, but you still decide on it, you won’t be able to predict in advance the reaction of another woman to your appearance. Upon learning of the existence of a mistress, a jealous woman may decide to divorce, but it is not a fact that after breaking up with her beloved, she will want to continue her relationship with you. It may also be that her husband's betrayal will not come as a surprise to her and she will make every effort to save the family;
• Pregnancy. Pregnancy from a relationship with a married man does not give you any guarantee that the child will have a caring father. No man likes to be manipulated, and it is likely that after such news he will disappear forever from your life.

In conclusion

If you agree to patiently wait for his voluntary decision to leave his wife for you, to make claims to your beloved about what you spent on him best years there is no meaning to your life - no one forced you to do anything. The same applies to women whose married lover later became their husband, but did not live up to expectations. The responsibility for our actions falls only on our shoulders, and it is important to understand this from the very beginning.

6 ways to painlessly get rid of a relationship with a married man

Almost every girl from childhood dreams of a prince on a white horse who will find her, win her heart and make her the happiest in the world. And so, the years passed, the girl grew up, and he appeared on the horizon - a real Prince, smart, cheerful, caring, reliable, handsome, in love, in a word, not a man - a dream. That's just the "Prince" has one drawback - the wedding ring on right hand. And before the woman there is a difficult choice: to become the mistress of this man or to seek fate elsewhere.

Love triangles are as old as the world, but now, like hundreds of years ago, women enter into a relationship with married men in the hope that sooner or later the beloved will make a choice in favor of his mistress, leave the family and marry her. Are such hopes justified? Is there a chance for a mistress to become the legal wife of her lover, or is she nothing more than a temporary entertainment for a man?

The attitude of men to mistresses

They don’t dream of being mistresses, but they become them by the will of their feelings. she will be able to win back her beloved from her wife. However, before considering what are the chances that a man will leave his wife and marry his mistress, it is necessary to understand why husbands decide to cheat on their wives and how they treat their mistress. Husbands who cheat on spouses can be conditionally divided into three main types:

1. Conditionally free - men whose marriage exists only legally. Such men may be in the process of divorcing their spouse or do not live under the same roof with her, they are seriously planning to divorce. These men, as a rule, honestly tell their mistress about their life situation, and if they have feelings for her, they speed up the process of divorce from their spouse, introduce the new chosen one to their parents, friends, and after receiving a divorce certificate, they may well go to the registry office with their mistress.

A mistress for some men is another way to diversify life2. Prudent - men who have a strong family and make connections on the side solely for the sake of entertainment, new sensations. These men immediately inform their mistresses that they are not going to divorce their wife and the mistress cannot count on more than regular meetings. Such men do not have strong feelings for their mistresses, for them a woman on the side is entertainment, a way to have a good time. These men do not limit the freedom of their mistresses, they can give expensive gifts, provide financial support, receiving tenderness, affection, sex in return.

3. Unhappy - men who tell their mistresses how deeply unlucky they were with their wife, about constant quarrels, scandals with their spouse, and that their mistress is almost the only happiness in their unhappy life. However, to the rational question of a new girlfriend, when he divorces his "terrible" wife, such a man begins to come up with 1000 reasons why he cannot do this right now, but promises to get a divorce as soon as the child finishes his studies / children grow up / he pays off the mortgage / he will be given a promotion/the Second Coming of Christ will come. In fact, men from this category do not plan to get divorced, because they do not want to change their established life, but they also do not want to lose their mistress, so they come up with excuses and amuse their girlfriend with vain promises.

It is obvious that mistresses of only the first of the above categories of men can seriously expect to change the status of their mistress to a stamp in their passport. However, many men from the third category can also tell their girlfriends that they are about to divorce their spouse, but their words will diverge from the real state of affairs. Therefore, psychologists advise women who are mistresses of married men not to wait for a lover's divorce for more than 1 year. The fact is that in the vast majority of cases, if a man really loves a new girlfriend and intends to be with her, he will file a divorce during the first year of their relationship.

Man's wife and mistress
Most men by nature do not like cardinal changes in life, therefore, without serious reasons, they will not dare to leave an established life and a wife with whom they have a warm relationship. In itself, a strong passion for a new girlfriend is not a sufficient reason for a man to divorce his wife, so unfaithful husbands prefer to date new sweetheart secretly, carefully concealing from the family the connection on the side. The reasons why men decide to divorce lie in his relationship with his wife, but not in his mistress, because if a man’s heart is occupied by his wife, there will initially be no place for another woman.

What should a married man's mistress do?

In life, events often do not go as planned, and many women fall in love with married men, become lovers. These women do not always have the strength and endurance to break off unpromising relationships, so psychologists give some advice to girls who, by the will of feelings, have become one of the corners love triangle. Using the recommendations, a woman will not force a man to divorce and marry her, but she will be able to own life better and over time - painlessly freed from communication with a married man.

Love for a married man is not a reason to forget about yourself
1. Pay enough attention to your beloved. Doing what you love, visiting beauty salons, going to the gym, expanding your range of interests, acquiring new hobbies, etc. - all this will help a woman make her life brighter and more eventful and help her gain confidence in herself, her strengths, attractiveness.

2. Do not disrupt plans because of a married lover. For example, if a woman is scheduled to meet with friends, and a married lover calls and informs her about his wife's departure and offers to meet, the mistress needs to go to her friends. Sacrificing plans for the sake of her lover, a woman equates herself in his eyes with almost the level of a domestic dog, resorting to the first call of the owner.

3. Forget about mom's instructions that "the way to a man's heart is through his stomach." He has a wife, let her cook for him, wash his clothes, etc. A woman trying to become a lover and nanny for a married man has practically no chance of becoming his wife - he will come to her like in a restaurant, a hotel with full board, to relax and have fun, and then return to everyday life.

A mistress is not a “vest” for a married man4. Stop a married lover talking about his wife. Many men try to “put pressure on pity” and cry in the vest to their mistresses about what bad wives they are. These conversations are empty, their direct goal is the manipulation of a mistress by a man, so if he raises this topic, you should offer to either file for divorce immediately or talk about something more interesting for a woman.
The mistress of a married man should not stop looking for his soul mate

5. Never try to inform your lover's wife of your existence. Many mistresses try to talk to their wife or arrange everything so that she finds out about her husband's relationship on the side and decides to divorce him. However, if the mistress reaches the goal, and the beloved’s wife leaves the unfaithful husband, it is unlikely that he will run to propose to his mistress - it is more likely that he will accuse her of all mortal sins for destroying his well-established life and breaking up his family.

6. Look for your Prince. Married lover a woman should initially be perceived as a temporary man, and relations with him as entertainment, and not refuse to get acquainted with other members of the stronger sex. Leading active life When meeting new people and not getting hung up on a married friend, a woman will definitely meet her soul mate and find family happiness.