Meeting or seven red lines. Seven red lines perpendicular to each other 7 red lines perpendicular to each other

Only the Universe and human stupidity are infinite. Although I have doubts about the first one. (c) Albert Einstein

Surely, you had a moment in your life when you needed to draw seven red lines, which must be strictly perpendicular, and in addition, some need to be drawn in green, and some more - transparent?

As a rule, people set such tasks with a very serious expression on their faces. This is well illustrated in the following ingenious video based on an equally ingenious story:

What to do if you find yourself in such a situation? We will not consider the “quit” option, although often this is the only simple and correct option.

More complex options that immediately come to mind - take at least 80% of the advance payment, discuss every detail, write everything down on paper and approve it with the customer before implementation, make a prototype, etc. Sounds rational. But why does it almost never work?

The problem is that if a person behaves irrationally, then none of the rational approaches will most likely work.

In practice, this will mean that the prototype will be constantly reworked, the original requirements and approvals will be lost, and the next discussion will add more questions than it will answer.

- Are you dumb? What's with the gladiolus? She is in a blue skirt. In the 16th century it would have been burned at the stake. They ask you why?

Most often, the cause of irrational behavior (in ordinary situations) is ordinary stupidity.

Is it necessary to argue with a fool? Most likely not, because in the course of the discussion he will lower you to his level, where he will win on his territory. What should be done?

First, you need to evaluate what will take more time - to do as they ask or to prove their case? Once upon a time, I mainly chose the second option, but over time I realized that this was a waste of time, which often ended in the presence of a high FPV, but the absence of a customer.

Secondly, it is necessary to try to translate all oral discussions into paper as much as possible - to make summary of meetings, to fix all agreements and compromises by e-mail or in documentation. This, at least, will make a person a little more responsible in what has been said.

And finally, you need to estimate the amount of possible profits and losses in the case when you still decide to complete the project in conditions of complete uncertainty and in the case when you decide to terminate the contract in the middle of the project without receiving payment. Sometimes it turns out that the second option is much more “profitable”.

How do you behave when you find yourself in an irrational situation?

To clarify the condition of the problem, I found the original text. The author turned out to be someone Alexei Berezin, a blogger. Everything would be fine, but there is one subtlety. There is one passage in the original text that clearly indicates the author's intent:

“Two lines can be perpendicular,” Petrov explains patiently. - All seven cannot be perpendicular to each other at the same time. This is geometry, 6th grade.

That is, it was supposed to be seven straight lines, but the author used the word "line". On purpose or through thoughtlessness, now it doesn’t matter anymore, the task has lost most of the pathos and inadequacy. It would be forgivable if it were a clumsy translation from English, where line means both "line" and "straight". The line may or may not be straight. But what's done is done.

And this gave rise to many formally correct, but ugly decisions.

I’ll just put a screenshot of the search engine results for the query “seven red lines”. As you can see, the creative quality is not the highest.

We define TK as:

1. Seven straight red lines.

2. All these straight lines are mutually perpendicular

3. These two lines are green.

4. Three are transparent.

5. One of the straight lines in the shape of a cat (any).

I confess that my first thought was to use Lobachevsky's geometry. There are many such solutions. Here, look at what beautiful Scott Williamson offers on a looped tape.

And although he uses red paper in his solution, there are still questions about green red. And with transparent red there, too, not everything is as clear as we would like.

In the world familiar to us, only three mutually perpendicular straight lines can be drawn. We need to come up with something that will allow us to hold four more. An obvious assumption would be that it is not necessary to be limited to three dimensions, more can be used. For example, seven. Then in the seven-dimensional space the problem has a simple solution.

A little more difficult with the green color of the red lines. To do this, they must approach the observer with a certain speed sufficient for the occurrence of the Doppler effect. A few formulas...

Let's take a simplified formula for speeds much less than the speed of light, we only need to estimate the order of magnitude.

v=cz

where z is the coefficient calculated by the formula

z = (λ - λ°) / λ

where λ is the wavelength of the visible color, λ° is the wavelength of the original color.

Red will have a wavelength of approximately 700 nm.

Green respectively 500 nm.

It turns out that the speed of approach will be approximately 0.3 of the speed of light. Theoretically quite possible speed. Everything is fine here...

Further assumptions become more. For the next three measurements, in which red (straight) lines are drawn, we assume that they do not interact with electromagnetic radiation in any way. Accordingly, straight red lines in them will be invisible (transparent).

And the most important thing! Let one of the dimensions, which does not interact with electromagnetic radiation in any way, be projected into our three-dimensional world and its projection takes the form of a cat. But, since it is invisible, the cat is also invisible. By analogy with Schrodinger's cat, I propose to call him Morkoveva's cat.

Finally, I would like to arrange all of the above in the form of a continuation of the same story:

“Remembering the last meeting, Petrov has been preparing for this for a long time. For every question and every objection, he now has something to say.

- Colleagues, - Petrov looks at those gathered at the table, smiles and adjusts his glasses, - the task was close to unsolvable, almost on the very border with the impossible.

Nedozaytsev looks at him with enthusiasm, Morkovyeva looks at him skeptically, and Lenochka tries to understand why she is here again. Sidoryahin is absent due to illness.

But I managed to solve it! - says Petrov and looks victorious. The fire of madness shines in his eyes.

Lenochka suddenly hiccups and is cutely embarrassed.

Here! - Petrov solemnly shows the image.

Everyone is watching.

But why are there only two? - Morkovyeva is surprised, - it must be ...

- No! - Petrov objects, - there are seven of them, in full accordance with your terms of reference.

- With which? - Morkovyeva flips through the papers, it is clear that she no longer remembers exactly what happened with the assignment.

- With yours, - Petrov smiles, - seven red straight lines perpendicular to each other, two red, two green, three transparent and one in the form of a cat.

- Kotika, yes, - Lenochka smiles. She is pleased that her fantasy was remembered.

Nedozaytsev looks in surprise from the image to Morkoveva and back.

- The problem has a rigorous solution only in multidimensional ... - Petrov begins.

- I don't understand, - Nedozaytsev can't stand it, - but why are there two of them?

- Let's ask questions later, - says Petrov, - if you have any left, you can ask them at the end.

- Yes, perhaps, - agrees Nedozaytsev. It is obvious that he is not happy.

- What you see is the projection of the solution of this problem in the seven-dimensional space onto the two-dimensional one. Just those same two red straight lines that should be red.

- Fine, - says Nedozaytsev, - but where are the others?

- The rest, - says Petrov, looking into the notebook, - I had to draw in dimensions that do not belong to our space and may not always be in it even in the form of a projection, for example, those two red lines that are constantly approaching us at a speed equal to approximately 0 .3 the speed of light.

Morkoveva's eyes begin to converge to the bridge of her nose. Nedozaytsev looks around fearfully in search of approaching lines and spaces, he shudders.

- For us, these red lines will look green, - says Petrov, - but imagine what will happen to our space when these measurements get here?

- No need to escalate, - Nedozaytsev shudders. He wants to say something else, but can't find it.

- Further, everything is simple, - says Petrov, - the next three red lines are drawn in measurements that do not interact with electromagnetic radiation in any way. Therefore, we cannot see them, they are absolutely transparent to us.

- And that is not all! - Petrov winks at Lenochka, one of these dimensions projecting into our dimension takes the form of a cat. We can't see it though, so it's... yes, it's a cat shape idea, a perfect implementation of a cat shape.

Lenochka smiles shyly.

- Ask questions, - says Petrov.

Nedozaytsev looks perplexedly from Morkoveva to Lenochka and back. Morkoveva's eyes converged to the bridge of her nose, Lenochka smiles embarrassedly.

“If there are no questions, then I’m done,” Petrov nods slightly.

Having worked for more than one year in the IT field, namely serving clients, solving their needs with phones, computers, home media servers, video surveillance, I came across a completely different tasks. Today a small note in the section humor just about clients, bosses and specialists who do everything.

It is not uncommon for clients to set tasks that are practically impossible to accomplish. Yes, just in the field of IT technologies, impossible tasks practically do not exist, but there are not achievable tasks within certain limits. Eg:

  • I want software for a media server based on AppleTV in a week. The software component must be written in AppleScript. The staff of programmers is 2 pieces, and then they are engaged in other, no less important things 80% of the time.
  • Make video surveillance from five cameras for $100
  • Want fast internet outside the city, I don't want to pay a lot for satellite internet.

Just, the video that I found on the Internet best describes this request. It has everything:

  1. Management who cannot understand why the project cannot be implemented. Also, management puts pressure on a specialist, because they think that he is stupid.
  2. A client who wants the impossible and insists on it, thinking, like the management, that the specialist is stupid.
  3. A specialist who is trying with all his might to convey to both the first and the second that this is basically impossible.

Enjoy watching.

For those who watched the video, noted such a game of actors, I can offer a designer selection that supposedly solves the tasks set out by the client.

In this version, everything is fine, of course, but not all lines are perpendicular to each other. There are parallel ones, but then again, there is a funny kitten 🙂

In this version, it is not clear what is meant by "Transparent lines". 3 lines are perpendicular to 4 other lines. those. the condition that all lines are perpendicular to each other is not met. And as in the first version, there is no kitten 🙂

The solution is very interesting for its unconventionality, because the condition does not say that the lines should not bend. But here's the problem with the greens...

According to me, this the best option. Much more beautiful and understandable than the previous one, and it seems that all the conditions are met.

As always, I'd love to hear your opinion in the comments.

(Conference room)
- Colleagues, - says the head of Nedozaytseva Morkovyeva, - our organization faces a large-scale task. We received a project for implementation, in which we need to draw several red lines. Are you ready to take on this task?

“Of course,” says Nedozaytsev, the head of Sidoryakhin. He is a director, and is always ready to take on a problem that someone from the team will have to bear. However, he immediately clarifies:

- Can we do it?

Petrov's boss Sidoryakhin nods hastily:

- Yes of course. Here we have Petrov sitting right here, he is ours the best specialist in the red line drawing area. We specially invited him to the meeting so that he could express his competent opinion.

“Very nice,” says Morkovyeva. “Well, you all know me. And this is Lenochka, she is a design specialist in our organization.

Specialist Lenochka blushes and smiles shyly. She recently graduated from economics, and has the same attitude to design as a platypus to the design of airships.

— So, — says Morkoveva. We need to draw seven red lines. All of them must be strictly perpendicular, and in addition, some need to be drawn in green, and some more - transparent. Do you think it's real?

“No,” says Petrov.

“Let's not rush into an answer, Petrov,” says Sidoryahin. “The task has been set, and it must be solved. You are a professional, Petrov. Don't give us a reason to think you're not a professional.

“You see,” Petrov explains, “the term “red line” implies that the color of the line is red. Drawing a red line in green is not exactly impossible, but very close to impossible...

- Petrov, what does "impossible" mean? asks Sidoryahin.

I'm just describing the situation. There may be people who are colorblind for whom the color of the line really won't matter, but I'm not sure if the target audience your project consists exclusively of such people.

- That is, in principle, it is possible, do we understand you correctly, Petrov? asks Morkoveva.

Petrov realizes that he went too far with imagery.

“Let’s put it simply,” he says. - The line, as such, can be drawn with absolutely any color. But to get a red line, you should use only red.

Petrov, please don't confuse us. You just said it was possible.

Petrov silently curses his talkativeness.

No, you misunderstood me. I just wanted to say that in some extremely rare situations, the color of the line will not matter, but even then - the line will still not be red. You see, it will not be red! She will be green. And you need red.

There is a short silence, in which the quiet, tense buzzing of synapses is clearly audible.

“But what if,” Nedozaytsev says, struck by the idea, “draw them in blue?”

“It won’t work anyway,” Petrov shakes his head. - If you draw in blue, you get blue lines.

Again silence. This time he is interrupted by Petrov himself.

“And I still don’t understand… What did you mean when you talked about lines of transparent color?”

Morkovyeva looks at him condescendingly, like a kind teacher at a lagging student.

- Well, how can I explain it to you? .. Petrov, don't you know what "transparent" is?

- And what is the “red line”, I hope you don’t need to explain either?

- No, it's not necessary.

- Here you go. You draw red lines for us with a transparent color.

Petrov pauses for a second, considering the situation.

- And what should the result look like, please, describe please? How do you imagine that?

- Well, uh, Petro-o-ov! Sidorakhin says. - Well, let's not ... What do we have, kindergarten? Who is the red line specialist here, Morkovyeva or you?

“I’m just trying to clarify the details of the assignment for myself…”

“Well, what’s incomprehensible here? ..” Nedozaytsev interjects into the conversation. Do you know what the red line is?

- Yes, but...

- And what is "transparent", is it clear to you too?

“Of course, but…

"So what do you have to explain?" Petrov, well, let's not stoop to unproductive disputes. The task is set, the task is clear and precise. If you have specific questions, please ask.

“You are a professional,” Sidoryakhin adds.

“Okay,” Petrov surrenders. - God be with him, with color. But do you have something else with perpendicularity there? ..

“Yes,” Morkovyeva readily confirms. “Seven lines, all strictly perpendicular.

- Perpendicular to what? Petrov clarifies.

Morkovyeva starts looking through her papers.

"Uh-uh," she finally says. - Well, sort of ... Everything. Between themselves. Well, or whatever… I don't know. I thought you know what are perpendicular lines, - finally she is.

“Yes, of course he knows,” Sidoryakhin waves his hands. Are we professionals here or not?

Two lines can be perpendicular, explains Petrov patiently. “All seven cannot be perpendicular to each other at the same time. This is geometry, 6th grade.

Morkovyeva shakes her head, driving away the looming ghost of a long-forgotten school education. Nedozaytsev slams his palm on the table:

- Petrov, let's do without this: "6th grade, 6th grade." Let's be mutually polite. Let's not make hints and slide down to insults. Let's support constructive dialogue. Here same not idiots gathered.

“I think so too,” says Sidoryakhin.

Petrov pulls a piece of paper towards him.

“Okay,” he says. Let me draw for you. Here is the line. So?

Morkoveva nods her head in the affirmative.

— Draw another one… — says Petrov. Is it perpendicular to the first one?

Yes, it is perpendicular.

- Well, you see! - happily exclaims Morkoveva.

“Wait, that's not all. Now draw the third one... Is it perpendicular to the first line?..

Thoughtful silence. Without waiting for an answer, Petrov answers himself:

— Yes, it is perpendicular to the first line. But it does not intersect with the second line. They are parallel to the second line.

There is silence. Then Morkovyeva gets up from her seat and, rounding the table, enters Petrov from the rear, looking over his shoulder.

“Well…” she says hesitantly. - Maybe yes.

"That's the point," says Petrov, trying to fix achieved success. - As long as there are two lines, they can be perpendicular. As soon as there are more...

- Can I have a pen? asks Morkoveva.

Petrov hands over the pen. Morkovyeva carefully draws a few uncertain lines.

- And if so?..

Petrov sighs.

It's called a triangle. No, these are not perpendicular lines. Plus, there are three of them, not seven.

Morkoveva purses her lips.

- Why are they blue? Nedozaytsev suddenly asks.

“Yes, by the way,” Sidoryakhin supports. — I wanted to ask myself.

Petrov blinks several times, looking at the drawing.

“My pen is blue,” he finally says. I'm just to show...

“It will turn out the same,” Petrov says confidently.

- Well, how about the same? Nedozaytsev says. How can you be sure if you haven't even tried? You draw red, and we'll see.

“I don’t have a red pen with me,” Petrov admits. But I can totally...

“But why didn’t you prepare,” Sidoryakhin says reproachfully. “We knew there would be a meeting…

“I can tell you with absolute certainty,” Petrov says in despair, “that exactly the same thing will turn out in red.

“You yourself told us last time,” Sidoryakhin retorts, “that you need to draw red lines in red. Here, I even wrote it down for myself. And draw them yourself with a blue pen. What do you think, red lines?

“By the way, yes,” remarks Nedozaytsev. - I also asked you about Blue colour. What did you answer me?

Petrov is suddenly saved by Lenochka, who is studying his drawing with interest from her seat.

“I think I understand,” she says. You're not talking about color right now, are you? It's about this one, what do you call it? Perper something?

“Perpendicular lines, yes,” Petrov responds gratefully. - It has nothing to do with the color of the lines.

“That's it, you completely confused me,” says Nedozaytsev, looking from one participant in the meeting to another. "So what's the problem with us?" With color or with perpendicularity?

Morkovyeva makes confused noises and shakes her head. She got confused too.

“Both the one and the other,” Petrov says quietly.

“I can’t understand anything,” says Nedozaytsev, looking at his clasped fingers. - There is a task. All you need is seven red lines. I understand that there would be twenty of them! .. But there are only seven. The task is simple. Our customers want seven perpendicular lines. Right?

Morkoveva nods.

“And Sidoryahin also sees no problem,” says Nedozaytsev. “Am I right, Sidoryahin?.. Well, then. So what is stopping us from completing the task?

“Geometry,” Petrov says with a sigh.

"Well, just ignore her, that's all!" Morkoveva says.

Petrov is silent, collecting his thoughts. Colorful metaphors are born in his brain one after another, which would make it possible to convey to those around him the surrealism of what is happening, but as luck would have it, all of them, clothed in words, begin with an invariably obscene word, completely inappropriate within the framework of a business conversation.

Tired of waiting for an answer, Nedozaytsev says:

- Petrov, you answer simply - can you do it or can't you? I understand that you are a narrow specialist and do not see the big picture. But it's not difficult to draw some seven lines? We have been discussing some nonsense for two hours now, we can’t come to a decision.

“Yes,” says Sidoryahin. - You just criticize and say: “Impossible! Impossible!" You offer us your solution to the problem! And even a fool can criticize, pardon the expression. You are a professional!

Petrov wearily says:

- Fine. Let me draw you two guaranteed perpendicular red lines, and the rest in transparent color. They will be transparent and not visible, but I will draw them. Will that suit you?

“Will that suit us?” Morkovyeva turns to Lenochka. - Yes, it will suit us.

“Only at least a couple more - in green,” Lenochka adds. - And I have another question, can I?

- Can one line be depicted in the form of a kitten?

Petrov is silent for a few seconds, and then asks again:

- Well, in the form of a kitten. Kitten. Our users love animals. It would be great…

“No,” says Petrov.

- And why?

— No, of course I can draw you a cat. I'm not an artist, but I can try. Only it will no longer be a line. It will be a cat. A line and a cat are two different things.

“Kitten,” Morkovyeva clarifies. - Not a cat, but a kitten, so small, cute. Cats they...

“It doesn’t matter,” Petrov shakes his head.

“Not at all, right? ..” Lenochka asks disappointedly.

“Petrov, you could at least listen to the end,” Nedozaytsev says irritably. - You haven't listened to the end, but already say "No".

“I understand the idea,” says Petrov, without looking up from the table. - It is impossible to draw a line in the form of a kitten.

“Well, you don’t have to then,” Lenochka allows. "Won't the bird work too?"

Petrov silently looks up at her and Lenochka understands everything.

“Well, don’t, then,” she repeats again.

Nedozaytsev slams his hand on the table.

- So where did we stop? What are we doing?

“Seven red lines,” says Morkovyeva. — Two in red, and two in green, and the rest transparent. Yes? Did I understand correctly?

“Yes,” Sidoryahin confirms before Petrov can open his mouth.

Nedozaytsev nods in satisfaction.

- That's great ... Well, then, that's it, colleagues? .. Let's part ways? .. Any more questions? ..

“Oh,” Lenochka recalls. We still have red balloon! Say, can you blow it up?

“Yes, by the way,” says Morkovyeva. Let's discuss this right away, so as not to gather twice.

"Petrov," Nedozaytsev turns to Petrov. - Can we do it?

“And what does the ball have to do with me?” Petrov asks in surprise.

“It’s red,” Lenochka explains.

Petrov is stupidly silent, trembling with his fingertips.

“Petrov,” Nedozaytsev asks nervously. So can you or can't you? It's a simple question.

“Well,” Petrov says cautiously, “in principle, of course, I can, but…

“Good,” Nedozaytsev nods. - Go to them, inflate. Travel allowance, if necessary, we will issue.

- Tomorrow can be? asks Morkoveva.

“Of course,” Nedozaytsev replies. - I think there will be no problems ... Well, now we have everything? .. Excellent. We worked productively ... Thank you all and goodbye!

Petrov blinks several times to return to objective reality, then gets up and slowly walks towards the exit. At the very exit, Lenochka catches up with him.

“Can I ask you more?” - blushing, says Lenochka. - When you inflate the balloon ... can you inflate it in the shape of a kitten? ..

Petrov sighs.

“I can do anything,” he says. - I can absolutely everything. I'm professional.

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Thank you for being with us all these years: loving and criticizing, supporting and advising. We will continue to develop the Communities project as a platform for the exchange of opinions of HR professionals. All information of "Groups" will be available for reading in view mode.


Petrov came to the meeting on Tuesday. They took out his brain there, put it on saucers and began to eat, smacking his lips and generally expressing all kinds of approval. Petrov's boss, Nedozaytsev, prudently handed out dessert spoons to those present. And it started.

Colleagues, - says Morkovyeva, - our organization faces a large-scale task. We received a project for implementation, within which we need to draw several red lines. Are you ready to take on this task?

Of course, - says Nedozaytsev. He is a director, and is always ready to take on a problem that someone from the team will have to bear. However, he immediately clarifies: - We can do it?

The head of the drawing department, Sidoryakhin, nods hastily:

Yes, of course. Here we have Petrov, he is our best specialist in the field of drawing red lines. We specially invited him to the meeting so that he expressed his competent opinion.

Very nice, - says Morkoveva. - Well, you all know me. And this is Lenochka, she is a design specialist in our organization.

Lenochka is covered with paint and smiles embarrassedly. She recently graduated from economics, and has the same attitude to design as a platypus to the design of airships.

So, - says Morkoveva. - We need to draw seven red lines. All of them must be strictly perpendicular, and in addition, some need to be drawn in green, and some more - transparent. Do you think this is real?

No, says Petrov.

Let's not rush to answer, Petrov, - says Sidoryakhin. - The task has been set, and it needs to be solved. You are a professional, Petrov. Don't give us a reason to think that you are not a professional.

You see, - explains Petrov, - the term "red line" implies that the color of the line is red. Drawing a red line in green is not impossible, but very close to impossible ...

Petrov, what does "impossible" mean? - asks Sidoryahin.

I'm just describing the situation. Perhaps there are colorblind people for whom the color of the line really will not matter, but I'm not sure that the target audience of your project consists exclusively of such people.

That is, in principle, it is possible, do we understand you correctly, Petrov? - asks Morkovyeva.

Petrov realizes that he went too far with imagery.

Let's put it simply, he says. - The line, as such, can be drawn in absolutely any color. But to get a red line, you should use only red.

Petrov, please don't confuse us. You just said it was possible.

Petrov silently curses his talkativeness.

No, you misunderstood me. I just wanted to say that in some extremely rare situations, the color of the line will not matter, but even then - the line will still not be red. You see, it will not be red! She will be green. And you need red.

There is a short silence, in which the quiet, tense buzzing of synapses is clearly audible.

And what if, - inspired by the idea, says Nedozaytsev, - draw them in blue?

It won't work anyway, - Petrov shakes his head. - If you draw in blue, you will get blue lines.

Again silence. This time he is interrupted by Petrov himself.

And I still don't understand... What did you mean when you talked about transparent color lines?

Morkovyeva looks at him condescendingly, like a kind teacher at a lagging student.

Well, how can I explain to you? .. Petrov, don't you know what "transparent" is?

And what is the "red line", I hope you don't need to explain either?

No, don't.

Here you go. You draw red lines for us with a transparent color.

Petrov freezes for a second, considering the situation.

And how should the result look like, please, describe please? How do you imagine it?

Well-u-u, Petro-o-ov! - says Sidoryahin. - Well, let's not ... Do we have a kindergarten? Who is the red line specialist here, Morkovyeva or you?

I'm just trying to clarify the details of the task for myself ...

Well, what’s incomprehensible here? .. - Nedozaytsev intervenes in the conversation. - Do you know what the red line is?

And what is "transparent", is it clear to you too?

Of course, but...

So what do you have to explain? Petrov, well, let's not stoop to unproductive disputes. The task has been set, the task is clear and precise. If you have specific questions, then ask.

You are a professional, - adds Sidoryahin.

Okay, - surrenders Petrov. - God be with him, with the color. But do you have something else with perpendicularity? ..

Yes, - readily confirms Morkovyeva. - Seven lines, all strictly perpendicular.

Perpendicular to what? - specifies Petrov.

Morkovyeva starts looking through her papers.

Uh-uh, she finally says. - Well, sort of... Everything. Between themselves. Well, or whatever... I don't know. I thought you know what perpendicular lines are - finally she is.

Yes, of course he knows, - Sidoryakhin waves his hands. - Are we professionals here, or are we not professionals? ..

Two lines can be perpendicular, - Petrov patiently explains. - All seven cannot be perpendicular to each other at the same time. This is geometry, 6th grade.

Morkovyeva shakes her head, driving away the looming ghost of a long-forgotten school education. Nedozaytsev slams his palm on the table:

Petrov, let's do without this: "6th grade, 6th grade." Let's be mutually polite. Let's not make hints and slide into insults. Let's have a constructive dialogue. It's not idiots gathered here.

I also think so, - says Sidoryakhin.

Petrov moves a piece of paper towards him.

Okay, he says. - Let me draw for you. Here is the line. So?

Morkovyeva nods her head in the affirmative.

We draw another ... - says Petrov. - Is it perpendicular to the first one?

Yes, it is perpendicular.

Well, you see! - joyfully exclaims Morkovyeva.

Wait, that's not all. Now draw the third one... Is it perpendicular to the first line?..

Thoughtful silence. Without waiting for an answer, Petrov answers himself:

Yes, it is perpendicular to the first line. But it does not intersect with the second line. They are parallel with the second line.

Silence comes. Then Morkovyeva gets up from her seat and, rounding the table, enters Petrov from behind, looking over his shoulder.

Well ... - she says uncertainly. - Probably, yes.

That's the point, - says Petrov, trying to consolidate the success achieved. - As long as there are two lines, they can be perpendicular. As soon as there are more of them ...

Can I have a pen? - asks Morkoviev.

Petrov hands over the pen. Morkovyeva carefully draws a few uncertain lines.

And if so?..

Petrov sighs.

This is called a triangle. No, these are not perpendicular lines. Besides, there are three of them, not seven.

Morkoveva purses her lips.

Why are they blue? - suddenly asks Nedozaytsev.

Yes, by the way, - supports Sidoryahin. - Sam wanted to ask.

Petrov blinks several times, looking at the drawing.

My pen is blue, he finally says. - I'm just to demonstrate...

It will turn out the same, - Petrov says confidently.

Well, how is it the same? - says Nedozaytsev. - How can you be sure if you haven't even tried? You draw red ones, and we'll see.

I don’t have a red pen with me,” Petrov admits. But I can totally...

Why didn’t you prepare, ”Sidoryakhin says reproachfully. - They knew that there would be a meeting ...

I can absolutely tell you for sure, - Petrov says in despair, - that exactly the same thing will turn out in red.

You yourself told us last time, - retorts Sidoryahin, - that you need to draw red lines in red. Here, I even wrote it down for myself. And draw them yourself with a blue pen. What are these, red lines in your opinion?

By the way, yes, - notices Nedozaytsev. - I also asked you about the blue color. What did you answer me?

Petrov is suddenly rescued by Lenochka, who studies his drawing with interest from her seat.

I think I understand, she says. - You are not talking about color now, are you? This is about this one, what do you call it? Perper-something-there?

The perpendicularity of the lines, yes, - Petrov responds gratefully. - It has nothing to do with the color of the lines.

That's it, you completely confused me, - says Nedozaytsev, looking from one participant in the meeting to another. - So what's the problem with us? With color or with perpendicularity?

Morkovyeva makes confused sounds and shakes her head. She also got confused.

Both with that, and with another, - quietly speaks Petrov.

I can’t understand anything, - says Nedozaytsev, looking at his fingers clasped in the castle. - Here is a task. All you need is seven red lines. I understand that there would be twenty of them! .. But there are only seven. The task is simple. Our customers want seven perpendicular lines. Right?

Morkoveva nods.

And Sidoryahin also sees no problem, - says Nedozaytsev. - Am I right, Sidoryahin? .. Well. So what is stopping us from completing the task?

Geometry, - Petrov says with a sigh.

Well, you just don't pay attention to her, that's all! - says Morkoveva.

Petrov is silent, collecting his thoughts. In his brain, one after another, colorful metaphors are born that would make it possible to convey to those around him the surrealism of what is happening, but as luck would have it, all of them, clothed in words, invariably begin with the word "Fuck!", Completely inappropriate within the framework of a business conversation.

Tired of waiting for an answer, Nedozaytsev says:

Petrov, you answer simply - can you do it or can't you? I understand that you are a narrow specialist and do not see the big picture. But it's not difficult - to draw some seven lines? We've been discussing some nonsense for two hours now, we can't come to a decision.

Yes, says Sidoryahin. - You just criticize and say: "Impossible! Impossible!" You offer us your solution to the problem! And then a fool can criticize, pardon the expression. You are a professional!

Petrov wearily says:

Fine. Let me draw you two guaranteed perpendicular red lines, and the rest in transparent color. They will be transparent and not visible, but I will draw them. Will that suit you?

Will it suit us? - Morkoveva turns to Lenochka. - Yes, it will suit us.

Only at least a couple more - in green, - Lenochka adds. - And I also have such a question, can I?

Can one line be drawn as a kitten?

Petrov is silent for a few seconds, and then asks again:

Well, in the form of a kitten. Kitten. Our users love animals. It would be great…

No, says Petrov.

And why?

No, of course I can draw a cat for you. I'm not an artist, but I can try. Only it will no longer be a line. It will be a cat. The line and the cat are different things.

Kitten, - specifies Morkovyeva. - Not a cat, but a kitten, so small, cute. Cats they...

It doesn't matter, - Petrov shakes his head.

Not at all, right? .. - Lenochka asks disappointedly.

Petrov, you should at least listen to the end, - Nedozaytsev says irritably. - You didn’t listen to the end, but you already say “No”.

I understood the idea, - without looking up from the table, says Petrov. - It is impossible to draw a line in the form of a kitten.

Well, it’s not necessary then, - Lenochka allows. - A bird, too, will not work?

Petrov silently looks up at her and Lenochka understands everything.

Well, it’s not necessary then, - she repeats again.

Nedozaytsev slams his palm on the table.

So where did we stop? What are we doing?

Seven red lines, says Morkovyeva. - Two in red, and two in green, and the rest in transparent. Yes? Did I understand correctly?

Yes, Sidoryahin confirms before Petrov can open his mouth.

Nedozaytsev nods in satisfaction.

That's great ... Well, then, that's it, colleagues? .. Disperse? .. Any more questions? ..

Oh, - Lenochka remembers. - We still have a red balloon! Tell me, can you inflate it?

Yes, by the way, - says Morkovyeva. - Let's also discuss this right away so that we don't get together twice.

Petrov, - Nedozaytsev turns to Petrov. - Can we do it?

And what does the ball have to do with me? - Petrov asks in surprise.

It is red, - Lenochka explains.

Petrov is stupidly silent, trembling with the tips of his fingers.

Petrov,” Nedozaytsev nervously asks. - So you can or can't? It's a simple question.

Well, - Petrov says carefully, - in principle, of course, I can, but ...

Good, - Nedozaytsev nods. - Go to them, inflate. Travel allowances, if necessary, we will write out.

Is it possible tomorrow? - asks Morkovyeva.

Of course, - Nedozaytsev answers. - I think there will be no problems ... Well, now we have everything? .. Excellent. We worked productively ... Thank you all and goodbye!

Petrov blinks several times to return to objective reality, then gets up and slowly walks towards the exit. At the very exit, Lenochka catches up with him.

Can I ask you more? - blushing, says Lenochka. - When will you inflate the balloon ... Can you inflate it in the form of a kitten? ..

Petrov sighs.

I can do anything, he says. I'm a professional.