The carrot and stick method: an outdated method of motivation or an effective tool? The carrot and stick method: how to use it in different areas of life.

Of course, this must be done subtly and unnoticeably. There are reliable tools for this, their names are well known: carrot and stick.

Of course, a man should not know that you are controlling him. The mechanism of influence is simple: it is approval or disapproval.
If your loved one did something good (went to the store, walked the dog, vacuumed the sofa, took medicine to his mother-in-law, invited him to a restaurant, etc.), be sure to praise him. Smile, hug, kiss, and he will be happy.

A man is designed in such a way that he constantly needs female praise. This is what he lives for - for admiration in the eyes of his beloved. So don't forget to celebrate his positive actions. He came home from work on time - well done, took out the trash - great, took the order for extra work - how caring he is! There's no need for any special sweetness here. Thank him, hug him, kiss him, and he will be happy.

As a result, your man will try to repeat those actions that evoke your praise. No wonder, any person strives to repeat what gives him pleasure.

However, there are women from whom you cannot beg snow in winter, let alone praise. They think that if they praise their partner, he will become proud and sit on his neck. Nonsense! He won't be able to sit on your neck because the carrot is in your hands. If you want, you approve; if you don’t, you close the “sweet syrup tap.”

How should you use disapproval?
If your partner did something wrong (for example, he paid too much attention to other women at a party, returned home too late, refused to go to the theater with you), then stop praising. Your loved one is already accustomed to approval and will want to receive another portion. But she’s not there! Did not deserve.

Instead of approval there will be a chill. Your silent ignorance will sow panic in the male soul. Your loved one will immediately begin to think: what happened, why did you turn away from him?

After some time, he will ask: what’s the matter, why are you offended by him?
Some women do not explain anything and continue to sulk in silence, believing that their loved one should guess everything himself. Don't repeat this mistake. He won't guess anything! Men are built differently. They are logical, rational, and cannot stand omissions. So tell him clearly and clearly what he did wrong and what you want from him.

Talk about it calmly. God forbid you raise your voice or shout. Just explain what exactly you are not happy with. Don’t brand him, don’t blame him, don’t label him like he’s this and that. Talk only about yourself, your feelings. For example, if he came home too late, say: “When you were gone for a long time, I was very worried and felt lonely. I don’t want to experience this anymore, so I ask you to come home on time.” When you avoid accusations and talk about yourself, it sounds more convincing.
Disapproval is the most powerful. There is no need for a raised voice here. Speak calmly, then your words will be significant.

If you learn to skillfully use the carrot and stick, then your loved one will not even realize that he is being controlled. Of course, to be frank, this is manipulation. But it is used for mutual benefit, right? If you did it for selfish purposes, then, of course, it would not be good. But if you use this method for mutual well-being, then why not? In the end, a smile, a good mood and a happy look from the woman he loves are the main rewards for a man. When his beloved is happy, he feels strong, needed and fulfilled.

The ability to invisibly control a man is a subtle art. There should be no bends in one direction or another. If you skillfully apply this method and manage to avoid extremes, then everything will be fine!

The carrot and stick method is often used in different areas of life. Personnel management, education, relationships - all these are areas where it is important to apply methods of reward and punishment. However, if we talk about carrots and sticks, then everything is somewhat more complicated than simply rewarding and punishing. What this complexity is and how to correctly apply this method in practice, we will consider in the publication.

Excursion into history

The carrot and stick method (more common as the praise and punishment method) is a special technique that helps achieve the desired actions from others through influence. This method is often used in pedagogical education, politics and personnel management.

The phrase “carrot and stick” exists even in foreign vocabulary, albeit in a modified form. This expression appeared in Russian journalistic publications at the end of the 19th century, and its first formulation sounded like “the carrot and the whip.” That is, it was a literal translation of the proverb from German.

In English, the expression will sound like “carrots and sticks.” They are associated with the only ways that influence a stubborn donkey and make him move.

This method of motivation is the oldest; one only has to remember the period of slavery, when the whip (in its most direct manifestation) was the driving force that forced a person to work. Much later, the founder of the scientific organization of labor put forward a proposal to increase efficiency with the help of incentives. Although now this method is not so effective.

Why doesn't the method work?

The carrot and stick method has been studied in various fields. It has acquired particular significance in the eyes of sociologists and social psychologists. The impact of this method could not be called stable and reliable. In some conditions, “carrot and stick” give the expected results, and in others - exactly the opposite.

The psychologist and sociologist explained this by saying that when a person is not provided with food and security, which are basic needs, the carrot and stick method works well. But in the case when basic needs are fully provided, desires of a higher level begin to appear, which is completely incompatible with this method of motivation. As a result, it becomes ineffective.

In each area, the carrot and stick method works and manifests itself differently, and in order to understand how it should be used and how it should not be used, we will consider each area of ​​human life separately.

Relationship

The carrot and stick method in relationships often manifests itself in the form of manipulation, especially if one of the partners is not confident enough. This quite often looks like playing on feelings. Inept conduct of such a “game” often threatens a break. If you constantly “give carrots”, then your partner will become too sweet, and this monotony will destroy him. And when the partner sees nothing except the whip, it is simply unbearable.

And before using this method, you need to think again about the purposes for which it will be used and whether such behavior is acceptable.

Methods of manipulation in relationships

The carrot and stick method with a man is mainly about moving closer and further away from him. Since men are by nature hunters and conquerors, it is much more interesting for them to be in a state of slight intrigue. This thesis is the basis for using carrots and sticks in relationships:

• There should be a little bit of everything, and the ratio of carrot and stick should be 1:7. That is, from time to time a young man needs to make a little shake-up in his relationship.
• Punishment can also be the lack of usual rewards.
• Good behavior or positive change is rewarded consistently and systematically.

But the main thing is to remember: before you rush at your partner with a whip, you need to think about the situation and try to build a dialogue, and it’s best to start with yourself.

Work in a company

This method of motivation is simple and at the same time complex. It is especially difficult to use it in a work team, where each employee must have his own approach. Now a person is more focused on self-realization and self-development, so if something is wrong, then no carrot will hold him back. Basically, employees are divided into 4 main types:

• Money lovers. Employees get jobs only because the company pays salaries “transparently.”
• Enthusiast. A person goes to work simply because he likes a certain job.
• Ideological patron. Such an employee prefers to work in a well-coordinated, friendly team and “for the idea.” And if they also pay for it, then he is generally in seventh heaven (such people also exist).
• Common people. They do only what is written in the rental agreement: no more and no less. For them, work is comparable to serving conscription.

"Gingerbread" for every employee

Due to these features, the manager’s carrot and stick method should be different for everyone. For example, representatives of the first group will leave the company with a light heart on the same day when their salary is delayed or the payment is not made transparently enough. Enthusiasts will do the job 100%; they care not only about their salary, but about respect and being accepted properly. They do not tolerate authoritarian leadership in any form; the “whip” in relation to such employees should hang in a distant and dark closet.

Ideological patrons go to work. For the sake of work, it will not be difficult for them to borrow money if their salary is delayed, and continue to work without slowing down. But in order not to lose such valuable employees, they need to be praised as often as possible, then they will work harder. “Ordinary people” are mainly people who know the business process well from the inside, so such employees negotiate with the main management, and if they manage to come to an agreement, then they become good employees, and if not, then the company may have a serious competitor.

The carrot and stick method in raising children

And the most difficult thing is to use this method in the educational process. A person is not a computer program that must perform a certain action under specified conditions. The carrot and stick method of education is unacceptable in modern society; in other words, it is considered unpedagogical. After all, if a child is punished for actions that do not conform to the norm, he will stop trusting others, and if he is encouraged too much, he will grow up to be selfish. In addition, carrots and sticks are one of the ways to impose your standards, and if used without certain knowledge, then it turns into simple manipulation.

As for education, the carrot and stick method is used by nature itself in the process of personality development. If a child touches a hot stove, he will certainly get burned and will be more careful next time. And if a parent, trying to prevent a burn, yells at the child (whip), then he is only delaying the inevitable. In the process of upbringing, it is important to explain why and for what the child is praised and why he is punished. The carrot and stick method in this segment is based on reasoned explanation from adults.

conclusions

Thus, we can conclude that the carrot and stick method will always take place in different spheres of human activity. Depending on human needs, new techniques will be created to influence the performance and motivation of the individual. The carrot and stick method is not only a targeted system of rewards and punishments established by someone, but a technology that must be approached wisely and applied according to the current situation. The effectiveness of the stick and the sweetness of the carrot depend only on this.

Recently, a lot of information has appeared in the media about various methods of managing subordinates - the so-called personnel management. Business managers face a difficult task: getting their staff to do their jobs as well as possible. In search of effective ways to influence subordinates, managers often mention the carrot and stick method.

In our relationships with our children, we also act as leaders in some way. We are looking for ways that would help us influence the child, make him obey and behave correctly. Whether we like it or not, most often we have to resort to the well-known carrot and stick method.

The harmonious development of our baby will depend on how we use this method, in what quantity and in what situations the child receives the carrot or stick.

Extremes

Svetlana, 29 years old, mother of 4-year-old Valera:
“If my son doesn’t want to listen to me, then no belt will fix him. I have already tried to discipline him with a belt, but he firmly stands his ground. When he stops listening to me, I can’t help myself, I start calling him names and humiliating him, it seems to me that this can break him and make him listen to me. I want to find at least some method that can help me manage my son’s behavior.”

Yulia, 33 years old, mother of 6-year-old Polina:
“I love my daughter very much, because I dreamed of a child for a long time. What do I do when Polina doesn't listen to me? Of course, I am dissatisfied, but I am against any severity. I try to distract her from her whims, hug her, kiss her. It happens that my daughter behaves defiantly, says stupid things and screams, then I simply don’t pay attention to her. She’s a girl, I have to be gentle with her.”

Olga, 24 years old, mother of 4-year-old Christina:
“I can’t help but buy my daughter toys when she asks me for them. She is an obedient girl, so I always want to buy her something to show her love. It happens, of course, that I don’t have money for something expensive for Christina. She begins to ask, for example, for an expensive doll, to cry, but we immediately call dad, and when he comes home from work, he brings what his daughter wants. I don’t see anything wrong with a child getting everything he dreams of.”

Each of us has a mechanism that forces us to act one way or another in relation to our children. We are all driven by our beliefs, emotions, weaknesses and principles at different points in our lives. It’s easier to say, “I can’t do anything about him,” than to start analyzing our behavior and finding that “hole” in our approach to parenting that is now manifesting itself in the child’s life. It is easier to find money and buy a coveted toy for a baby than to teach her to accept situations when it is impossible to get everything she wants.

It is important to understand what motivates us when we take this or that step towards our child. Isn’t it our selfishness that underlies the fact that we use “easy ways” to achieve obedience? If we see the fear of punishment in a child’s eyes and take advantage of this by constantly reminding us of the strap hanging on the hook to make it easier for us to control the baby, what makes us do this? Are we aware of what we are shaping in a child through our upbringing methods?

If one of the extremes is to follow your mood, your weaknesses or emotions, then the other, the opposite, is to blindly obey your principles: if you didn’t listen to your parents, they gave you a belt, if you listened, you were allowed to watch a cartoon.

Vlada, 36 years old, mother of 5-year-old Alina:
“My daughter knows: you need to eat at the table without talking, no objections are accepted. If you don’t like the dish, you’re free to leave the table, you won’t get anything until the next meal. Several times my daughter seemed hungry, now she tries to eat everything they give her.”

Anna, 26 years old, mother of 3-year-old Anton:
“From the age of two, my son learned the rule of our family: purchases of toys, praise, attention from adults, permission to watch cartoons and other pleasant things must be earned. We are raising a real man, so we don’t waste ourselves on causeless tenderness and all sorts of pampering. Everything must have a reason. If Anton behaved badly, did not obey, did not collect toys, etc., we behave strictly with him so that he feels that he does not deserve our affection and other “charms of life.”

Unconditional implementation of the rule: “disobedience is punishment, obedience is praise” is very similar to training. This is how Dr. Pavlov discovered conditioned reflexes in animals. But children are people, albeit small ones. Training may work, but what is its purpose? The baby will develop certain fears, an understanding of what behavior he is beaten for and what he is praised for, but what is happening in the child’s soul at this moment? And what happens if the child ends up in a place where there are no strict parents? What will be his attitude towards wrong behavior?

Extremes are the scourge of many parents. The behavior of mom and dad can also be called extreme when they react completely differently to the same action of the child. Three days ago, when the baby broke a cup, the mother removed the glass and carefully asked if he was hurt. Today, being in an irritated state, the mother sharply grabbed the child by the hand and shouted at him for accidentally falling a saucer. What did she plant in the child’s soul with her reaction? Why did she do this?

All our actions towards children should be motivated by the formation of the child’s holistic personality. This includes his correct self-esteem, respect for elders, and an adequate attitude towards everything that happens around him. Every time ask yourself the question: what am I shaping in my child at the moment?

Whip: is it necessary?

There is hardly a single family in which a child has never been punished. Moreover, the punishment may not necessarily be physical. For some children, a strict tone or deprivation of watching their favorite cartoon is enough.

For many parents, it will seem like a miracle when a child simply obeys his parents without slaps or shouts. But, if you trace the relationship between our slaps on the head and the child’s reaction, you can always see a pattern: in order to achieve results, physical punishment must constantly be increased. If a child, unaccustomed to such a method of education, is lightly spanked once on the bottom for some offense, his reaction will be completely different than that of one who is often subjected to strong physical punishment: a child who is accustomed to a strap cannot be forced to obey with a light spank.

However, punishment cannot be excluded from the list of positive methods of influencing a child. If used correctly, it can bear good fruit in the hearts of our children.

First of all, we must remember that children are easily suggestible. Use this method before you start punishing. Talk to your child about the problem that has arisen, explain why and what he is doing wrong. Look your baby in the eye, make sure he doesn't get distracted and listens to you carefully. This method may not work immediately. But, if you systematically calmly and lovingly instill something in your child, you will soon see results.

Warn your child about the punishment several times before performing it. This will help the child see the cause-and-effect relationship in his actions. This will also give your child the opportunity to think and correct his behavior in time to avoid punishment.

Consider whether to punish your child for what happened. There are actions for which you cannot be punished. It is important to first find out the motives of the child’s actions, and then pass judgment. If a child accidentally did something wrong, or wanted to achieve one result, but got the opposite, your punishment can only aggravate the child’s already suffering heart. The loss or damage of property can be hard on a child's tender soul at a time when some of us are ready, if not to spank, then to yell at a child for making a mistake.

Do not start your educational process with physical punishment. Teach your child to understand words so that obedience in him is caused by common sense, and not by fear or pain from the strap. Convince your child, teach him to negotiate and understand your words. After all, many parents simply don’t want to strain themselves and therefore don’t try to spend time and effort trying to “reach out” to the baby’s consciousness with words.

Aim for minimal use of punishment. Always keep in mind that the saying “one gets used to everything” is also true for those who are raising children. If you teach a one-year-old child to listen to his parents only after a slap on the bottom, then after a year or two, in order to achieve obedience, one spank will certainly not be enough - he will get used to this procedure, and it will no longer give the expected result, it will be necessary to increase the punishment.

If punishment is inevitable, be sure to explain to your child why you punished him. This is an important pedagogical point that should not be missed, especially in raising preschool children. Ask your child if he understands why he is being punished. If he gives the correct answer, encourage him and inspire him to do things differently next time to avoid trouble. If he answers vaguely, incorrectly, or doesn’t answer at all, your task is to give a clear explanation of your actions and make sure that the baby understands you and the lesson is learned.

Punish with love, convince that you are doing this only for the benefit of the child. The baby should see not the angry face of his mother, grabbing the lozin, but wisdom and, where necessary, sternness in your eyes; most of all, there should be love in your appearance. This does not mean that you should smile and remove the strap from the hanger, or laughingly say: “Son, for the next three weeks I forbid you to watch cartoons.” It is important that the child knows that he is loved, but his behavior is upsetting and he ignored several warnings, and now the mother is forced to fulfill her promise.

Periodically recall past “lessons” with your baby. Talk about how not to behave, talk about things that upset mom and dad. It is better to remind the child of the situation in words as a way to “reinforce what has been learned” and explain to him once again how to behave correctly, than to wait for him to do something again for which you will punish him.

Teach to obey not out of fear of punishment, but out of love and respect for you. Remind your child in time about his behavior: “Son, who should we listen to now: mom or you?”, “Daughter, you’re not listening to mom now, have you decided that you’re doing the right thing?” Appeal to the child's conscience. Teach this from early childhood, so that later you don’t have to throw up your hands: “You can’t do anything with him, he only understands when you give him a belt.”

Gingerbread: when and how much?

Every mother dreams of giving her child what she once lacked in childhood. The Soviet regime dictated its own rules for treating children: “kiss only when sleeping, so as not to spoil them,” etc. Therefore, even now it seems unnatural to us when someone expresses their positive emotions, does not hesitate to praise, confess their love, hug and laugh with happiness. Nevertheless, we all want not to depend on complexes and prejudices and raise our children to be full-fledged individuals.

Praise your child for his success, efforts and desire to achieve his goal. Positive emotions will be an incentive to reinforce correct behavior. Children who are praised for their achievements and inspired to master new heights have correct self-esteem and also perceive others adequately.

You can argue with those parents who are sure that their child has absolutely nothing to encourage or praise for. In every child there is something that must be found - that small grain of goodness that must be nurtured with your love and helped to manifest itself in the child.

Rewards can serve as an incentive to change for the better. If your child is very slow, for example, try to notice even the slightest attempt by him to do something on time. Focus on his achievement, say that you are proud that your baby did this.

If a child knows that he can get a few coins for ice cream for doing housework in addition to his class duties, or that for a corrected grade in a quarter he will be bought a toy that he has long dreamed of, the child will strive to win your praise and approval. The main thing is to find the “key” that suits your baby.

Tell your child kind words about himself. Notice his polite behavior, praise him for his efforts, thank him for his help. The more goodness you sow in the heart of your child, the more good harvest you will reap later. And this goodness should not consist in spoiling the child, praising him for every little thing. It should come from common sense, dictated by the understanding that all your actions should benefit the baby. Both the carrot and the stick must be constructive. Always analyze: what will shape your behavior in your baby? Ask yourself a question: what do I want to achieve and what will I achieve in my child if I perform this or that action in relation to him?

The “Carrot and Stick” method is the very first concept of motivation; it arose in ancient times and has existed throughout the history of human development. The main meaning of this method is revealed in its name: for completed work a person receives a reward (in ancient times, food, currently a salary), for unfulfilled work - punishment (corporal punishment, reprimand, deprivation of bonus, deprivation of salary). This method is ineffective in modern conditions, since, firstly, it does not imply self-development of the employee, increasing productivity on his own initiative, or advanced training; and secondly, the moral and social development of a person has reached a level where the employee will not tolerate moral, much less material, infringement of his needs, and if such occurs, he will quit. Although this method is not effective and has long been outdated, it was widely used in routine, monotonous, monotonous operations in Soviet times. Currently, the “Carrot and Stick” method can be traced in the following remuneration scheme: this is remuneration based on the principle of a percentage of sales; if you sold a product, you received a certain percentage of the transaction amount; if you didn’t sell, you don’t receive any money. Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs system of classification of human needs proposed by Abraham Maslow. In I.p.M. groups of physiological, social needs, needs for safety, respect and self-expression are distinguished.
Rice. 21. Maslow's hierarchy of needs Maslow argued that human behavior depends on which of the five basic types of needs is currently dominant. Let's look at all five levels of Maslow's hierarchy of needs. 1. Physiological needs. They consist of basic, primary human needs, sometimes even unconscious. Sometimes, in the works of modern researchers, they are called biological needs. In relation to the work environment, these are the needs for wages, leave, pensions, breaks, favorable working conditions, lighting, heating and ventilation. 2. Need for security. Once physiological needs are satisfied, the need for safety comes to the fore. These needs reflect the desire to maintain rewards and position already obtained and to protect oneself from danger, harm, threats, injury, loss or deprivation. In organizations, these needs take the form of employee struggles for job security, seniority systems, unionization, safe working conditions, fringe benefits, insurance, and severance pay. 3. Social needs. Once physiological and safety needs have been satisfied, the person's attention shifts to the need for friendship, love, and belonging. As “social animals,” people have a desire to be liked by others and want to satisfy their social needs at work. This occurs by joining formal and informal work groups, by collaborating with other workers, and by participating in a variety of collaborative activities. 4. Esteem needs. These needs can take two different forms. The first is the need for self-esteem, i.e. self-satisfaction. Self-esteem is closely related to feelings of accomplishment, competence, knowledge, maturity, and dependency. The second form is the need for respect from other people. This need is associated with reputation, social recognition, and status within the group. In any organization, rewards that can satisfy the need for esteem include honorary titles, other forms of recognition, praise, additional responsibilities, and promotions. 5. Needs for self-realization and self-expression. When the needs of the four lower levels are satisfied, a person focuses his attention on satisfying the need for self-realization. In trying to achieve this, people try to realize their full potential, increase their abilities and be the “best”. This need for self-expression is the highest of all human needs. Herzberg's theory

Herzberg continued the work of Maslow and created a specific substantive theory of work motivation. He conducted a widely publicized study of motivation involving accountants and engineers from companies in and around Pittsburgh. To obtain data, he used the critical situation method. At the same time, negative feelings were associated mainly with the external conditions in which the work was carried out - its context. Having arranged these expressed positive and negative feelings in the form of a table (see Table 1), Herzberg concluded that satisfaction is related to the content of the work, and dissatisfaction is related to its context.

Table 1. Herzberg's two-factor theory