Self-criticism is an extremely useful tool if you know how to customize it for yourself. Self-criticism - is it good or bad, how to get rid of it

Hello, friends! In this article I want to discuss the concept of self-criticism, its importance in a person’s life, as well as its impact on one’s future destiny. We will look at what positive aspects it brings to human life, as well as how it can destroy many aspects of the psyche, relationships and development opportunities.

What is self-criticism?

Self-criticism is a personal quality that allows you to evaluate your own actions and motives from an objective and unbiased perspective. This is the trait through which a person can find shortcomings in his own work and character traits, in behavior and relationships with people.

Criticism towards oneself necessarily includes self-esteem, without arrogance and narcissism. Being in these two positions at the same time, a person is able not to be angry with the entire outside world and make timely attempts to change. Other people's comments are received with gratitude. A person is able to listen to the advice of others, even if it is given from an edifying position.

By comparison, someone who is not open to criticism of their actions and personality will perceive comments with anger, trying to attack in response or defend themselves. In many ways, the ability to be critical is explained by the level of self-acceptance and the ability to put up with the imperfections of the world. It is not an innate and stable characteristic, but rather a consequence of upbringing.

If desired, each person is able to adjust the level of criticality of the inner view. This can happen after significant events, changes, or as a result of targeted work together with a psychotherapist.

How to relate to this concept and what to do with your own level of criticism - everyone decides for themselves. To make the right decision, I recommend carefully studying the positive and negative aspects of the influence of self-criticism on a person’s life.

The positive aspects of self-criticism

For a mature person, critical remarks are the norm. They bring only positive changes, even if the initial feelings are unpleasant. It’s absolutely normal to be upset by the realization that somewhere the level of knowledge does not correspond or the work was done poorly. But it is the understanding and analysis of one’s actions that provide the opportunity for self-improvement.

Self-criticism should work to develop the individual and eliminate shortcomings, help develop the ability to see one’s weaknesses in time and form a different position.

Ideally, criticism directed at oneself helps to realistically assess the situation. Those. a quality that is initially positioned as an assessment of one’s own condition ultimately leads to the ability to evaluate others.

A person who is able to adequately understand his condition can objectively evaluate those around him, which helps build quality connections. And the one who considers himself the smartest and most beautiful (in the absence of self-criticism) or unworthy and ugly (in the absence of self-criticism) ultimately cannot adequately assess the situation in the real world.

Thus, a healthy critical and even slightly ironic attitude towards oneself ensures good socialization. It helps to see the paths of necessary development.

Healthy self-criticism should lead to:

• increasing the level of personal responsibility (for future fate and decision-making in current situations);
• taking upon oneself certain restrictions and austerities related to the elimination of harmful habits and actions (applies to situations when a person commits unnecessary actions);
• implementation of a new activity, the goal of which is further development (applies to situations when the necessary actions are not performed).

In all options, actions are required that change the person himself and his reality, his attitude towards the world. If a person only talks about his own unworthiness and depravity, without making attempts to turn the situation in his favor, then this state is called self-criticism or self-flagellation.

The purpose of such empty talk may be to elicit sympathy from others. Such a desire to get help or to plunge into sad experiences.

If changes do not occur, self-criticism ceases to be a useful quality for the individual and begins to manifest itself in a negative way.

How can self-criticism interfere with life and fulfillment?

It is good if a person can not only see his own shortcomings, but also direct them into a positive direction of change. But remember yourself when your reproaches did not turn into changes.

Examples of destructive self-criticism:

• Constantly scold yourself for lack of willpower and excess weight, continuing to eat kilos of cakes.
• Fail to prove your professional incompetence, while refusing to take advanced training courses.
• Reproach yourself for the lack of interest in yourself from others, while being rude and committing bad acts towards people.

Such examples show how excessive self-criticism without a vector of effective activity can be introduced into our lives. Moreover, the consequences of such behavior can be quite serious for the individual and the psyche as a whole.

Common violations due to an increased level of criticality may include:

• decreased self-esteem;
• development ;
• increased internal anxiety;
• problems in building social connections;
• lack of professional and creative realization;
• general personality degradation (in the most severe and prolonged cases).

Being exclusively a habit of building one’s own thoughts, self-criticism can distance a person from realizing his goals. Anyone who constantly scolds himself and considers himself a failure is unlikely to try his hand at a new project. Those who consider themselves ugly rarely approach people to meet people, thereby taking away a lot of opportunities from their lives.

In addition, it is worth remembering that people treat us the way we allow. This means that the more a person talks about his shortcomings, the more they will be seen in him. For comparison, look at those who constantly talk about their luck, professionalism and other advantages - objectively they may be the same as those of the person criticizing himself, but in the eyes of others, one will be a loser, and the other a winner. The strong tendency to exaggerate shortcomings ends up making them real.

Conclusion

As you can see from what has been described, the lack of self-criticism, as well as its excessive manifestation, can lead to disastrous results. The benefit and degree are determined by each person independently relative to the situation and internal sense of self. The main thing is to focus on the possibility of transforming the ability to notice shortcomings into the ability to correct them.

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The material was prepared by Yulia Gintsevich.

Self-criticism is an ability inherent in a mentally mature and developed personality, which consists in a reflective perception of one’s own life and personality, an independent search for mistakes made, both in the behavioral and mental spheres. Self-criticism is a sign of mental health when it is expressed within reasonable limits and is relevant to current events, but its excessive manifestations indicate, on the contrary, the presence of mental disorders and are symptoms of psychoneurological disorders.

Self-criticism is not synonymous with self-deprecation and other options that are destructive for and based on feelings of guilt and. Self-criticism represents a more or less objective point of view on oneself, where both advantages and disadvantages are present and equally evaluated, which can be compared with an outside view.

Judgments of self-criticism are based on a person’s internal beliefs, determined by his values ​​and goals, and only such a correlation of oneself with one’s own preferences is relevant to the concept of self-criticism. Any comparisons and comments about one’s own inconsistency with someone else’s value system indicate a dependent position of the individual, inadequate self-esteem. Inadequate self-esteem (inflated) is evidenced by the absence of self-criticism, which can be justified by a low level of personal development or disturbances in the psycho-emotional sphere (in the manic stage, inadequacy of oneself, as well as the absence of self-criticism, are characteristic).

In different contexts and ways of using this ability, stunning positive results and detrimental consequences for the psyche are possible, since, like any quality, especially inherent in a highly developed personality, self-criticism is only a tool (and the outcome depends on the person) and a litmus test (adequacy and degree of development).

Is self-criticism good or bad?

When faced with this concept and its neutral initial connotation, it is difficult to unambiguously determine whether self-criticism is classified as a negative manifestation or, on the contrary, is a trait that is worth working on to develop. Life encounters those who constantly criticize themselves, at the slightest mistake they begin to complain and blame themselves for everything, humiliating their qualities and devaluing their personality - such people evoke sympathy only the first time, and then the desire to remove this person from your social circle grows incredibly. At the same time, those who themselves notice their mistake admit it, perhaps even scolding themselves in this place, but strive for correction, knowing and noticing their positive, strengths, inspire respect, such people want to imitate, they conquer with inner courage and strength in recognizing one’s own imperfection.

The benefits of a self-critical attitude are expressed in the ability to increase one’s own effectiveness (discarding ineffective strategies), additional (to correct shortcomings and fill gaps), and the ability to thoroughly analyze the task at hand (taking into account positive and negative aspects, being able to foresee risks). As for areas of interaction, self-critical people are more pleasant to communicate with, due to an adequate assessment of themselves, and, accordingly, a respectful attitude towards others. The ability to objectively assess oneself helps to build longer-term relationships, makes it possible to hear the point of view of another and make compromise decisions in the event of a clash of opinions. The very understanding that everyone is far from unwritten standards gives rise to a calm acceptance of the shortcomings of others, which in turn allows people nearby to breathe freely and be themselves, without trying to conform to the norms.

Self-criticism is a mechanism that allows you to notice your shortcomings and, accordingly, makes it possible to correct them. Even if we are not talking about the presence of serious problems, then a self-esteem close to reality and an assessment of one’s abilities allows one to notice current paths and areas and improvements not only in one’s own personality, physical embodiment, but also in the quality of life and the contribution made to the surrounding reality.

At the same time, psychological science does not encourage self-criticism as a separate quality, since such behavior brings discord into internal harmony. Ideally, a person accepts himself, rejoices at the successes achieved, and notices his mistakes, draws conclusions and corrects them as much as possible. Those. It is precisely in the variant of objectively noticing one’s own negative qualities that self-criticism will be useful, but with diligent attention to shortcomings or with prolonged condemnation of oneself, we are already talking.

The shortcomings of self-criticism begin to appear as its level increases, despite the fact that self-criticism is a sign of a harmonious and developed personality; when taken to the maximum, it turns into self-flagellation, self-criticism, which have a destructive and degrading effect on the personality. Among the consequences of excessive self-criticism: decreased self-esteem (and subsequent destruction of personality), uncertainty, apathy, loss of significant social contacts (in large doses, self-criticism alienates others), inability to choose and make decisions, development of pathological feelings of guilt and toxic shame.

You can correct the first manifestations yourself by changing your behavior and focusing on achievements. You can ask friends for help and surround yourself with positive and creative people - mood spreads like a virus, and the habit of praising yourself is picked up from others as easily as special words and phrases. But if the situation is brought to the point of absurdity and a person’s personality is already in the process of destruction, then qualified psychotherapeutic assistance is needed to restore an adequate level of self-esteem, eliminate the consequences of toxins of guilt and shame, and develop new models of independent functioning.

Criticism and self-criticism

Despite the fact that the words critic and self-criticism are perceived by many as obviously negative, there is nothing similar in these concepts. Any criticism is aimed at analyzing and assessing human activity, and has as its goals the identification of errors, contradictions, assessment of authenticity and reliability. Criticism itself and its manifestations can take the forms of fair (when there are real and fair errors, inconsistencies or unreliability) and unfair (when it is accusatory in nature, does not correspond to reality, is associated more with emotions than with factual shortcomings) criticism.

Critical thinking is aimed at analysis (of a situation, a process, a person, an action), without the interference of personal preferences, mood tendencies and the desire to see a certain result. Speaking about a critical perception of the world, we mean the ability to have an adequate view, without rose-colored glasses and the desire to see what we want. This is an ability developed over the years and life experience, which makes it possible to abstract and look at a situation from the outside, noticing both positive and negative sides. If, when evaluating your work, someone expresses only a negative opinion, devaluing your successes, then this is either unfair criticism, the purpose of which is to damage your self-esteem, or a biased assessment of the situation.

Everyone was subjected to critical statements, and both types of this concept. You can perceive critical comments as insults, reacting or taking offense, going into protest or confrontation, or you can cooperate and benefit from the comments, thanking the person for pointing out shortcomings that you did not notice on your own and striving for correction.

Self-criticism works according to the same laws as criticism, with the only difference being that a person criticizes himself, which in some way complicates the possibility of an objective attitude. Self-criticism is a trait of a highly developed personality, on the simple basis that a person who is not guided by the rules of society, who considers his actions and reasoning to be the only correct ones, does not have at least any ability for objective reasoning and impartiality.

The qualities of criticism and self-criticism are equally significant, both at the level of the individual and the entire society. In a particular case, they help to improve, adapt in society, achieve more, and in the universal case, these mechanisms of analysis and search for imperfections contribute to the development and successful existence of the species. The ability to revise previous models of constructing one’s life, in particular models of social institutions, provides opportunities for change, an impetus for new ideas about the world. These are perpetual motion machines (external and internal) that promote development and self-presentation.

But just as excessive self-criticism eats up a person from the inside, criticism received from the outside world can even faster destroy all aspirations and self-understandings, being a serious mechanism of influence that forces a person to doubt his own strengths, abilities, desires (particularly cruel and constant criticism has driven people to the point of madness and).

One day a young man came to the sage’s house and asked him a question: “What do I need to do to gain wisdom?” The sage thought and said: “Go outside and wait a little.” It was raining outside, and the young man thought to himself: “So how will this help me? Although, what doesn’t happen, anything happens.” He left the house and stood on the porch right under the downpour.

The guy was soaked to the skin, and within ten minutes there was not a dry spot left on him. He returned to the house and said: “I did as you said. What's next? The teacher asked him: “Tell me what happened. While you were standing in the rain, did you have any revelation?”

The young man scratched his head: “Revelation? What other revelation? There was no revelation - I just stood there and got wet, like a fool!” To this the sage replied: “Rejoice! This is a real revelation! You have taken the path of wisdom, and this is the right path. If you know that you are a fool, then you have already begun to change!”

With this short story, we wanted to say how important it is to be able to perceive yourself critically, to see your shortcomings and negative traits, to understand your weaknesses and strengths in order to develop. And that everyone who strives for wisdom must be self-critical.

What is self-criticism?

Self-criticism is a person’s special ability to reflexively perceive himself and his own life, independently look for his own mistakes and shortcomings in thoughts, behavior and actions. This ability is possessed by mentally mature and developed people. Psychology says that if self-criticism does not go beyond reasonable limits and is relevant to what is happening, then this is a sign of a person’s mental health. But excessive self-criticism may indicate that there are some kind of psychoneurological disorders, but more on that later.

There is no need to perceive self-criticism as self-criticism, self-examination, or something else that negatively affects self-esteem and which may be based on a feeling of shame or guilt. Self-criticism is the ability to look at yourself as objectively as possible, and equally evaluate your shortcomings and strengths and compare them.

The basis of self-critical judgments is a person’s internal beliefs, determined by his values, principles and even goals. Only when a person looks at himself through their prism can we talk about self-criticism, because if he compares himself to someone else's belief system, he is dependent and does not adequately evaluate his own personality.

We will not argue that, along with the amazing positive impact of self-criticism on consciousness, it can also be destructive and lead to negative results. Therefore, let's figure out whether it is good or bad to be a self-critical person.

The benefits and harms of self-criticism

The concept of self-criticism itself is neutral, and it will not be possible to immediately assign the meaning “good” or “bad” to it. You yourself can remember examples of people who every now and then begin to criticize, reproach and blame themselves over the slightest trifle, devaluing their qualities and humiliating their own personality. But there are also examples of those who notice their mistakes and mistakes and admit them, even if they treat themselves strictly at such moments, but still strive to improve and develop positive qualities and strengths.

The positive impact of self-criticism lies in discarding ineffective strategies of thinking and action, gaining motivation to rise to a new level, analyzing one’s potential and goals set for oneself, and the ability to predict events. Self-criticism can also make a person more pleasant in terms of, increase his ability to correctly evaluate himself, and cultivate a respectful attitude towards others. Adequate self-esteem and assessment of one’s capabilities open doors for a person to self-development and improvement of personality, quality of life, life and professional results.

But, at the same time, psychology does not welcome excessive self-criticism, which is an independent quality. This can easily lead to loss of internal balance, discord with oneself, and disruption of harmony. If we talk about an ideal situation, then a self-critical person accepts his Self, is able to rejoice in victories and successes, and analyzes failures in order to draw the right conclusions and change his behavior. But if he examines his every minus too diligently, as if under a microscope, or is inclined to scold and scold himself for a long time, there is nothing good in this.

The harmful effects of self-criticism certainly exist, and it manifests itself when its level increases. If you take it to the maximum, it will instantly turn into self-flagellation, because of which a person not only destroys himself, but truly degrades. As a result, self-esteem falls and begins to appear; a person becomes indifferent and even apathetic, pushes people away from him, and loses the ability to make decisions. And feelings of guilt, shame and self-pity turn into chronic ones.

Thus, we can draw an intermediate conclusion by highlighting the advantages and disadvantages of self-criticism.

Benefits of self-criticism:

• Opportunity for self-improvement
• An objective look at yourself
• Recognizing your negative qualities and shortcomings
• The ability to draw conclusions and learn from mistakes
• Ability to adjust your actions
• Motivation to achieve new goals
• Increased courage and self-confidence
• Cutting off self-confidence and the feeling of “I’m always right”
• Cutting off narcissism and narcissism
• Cultivating respect for others
• The ability to admit your mistakes

And a little more specifics about this. In learning, the ability to criticize oneself activates the desire to gain new knowledge and avoid looking at things superficially. In her work, she helps determine directions for professional growth, adjust actions and move up the career ladder.

In interpersonal interaction, self-criticism also develops empathy, provides an incentive to perceive other points of view and become a more interesting interlocutor, as well as make new acquaintances. Finally, in family, friendship, and romantic relationships, self-criticism teaches a person to seek compromise, admit when he is wrong, and show sincere attention and care for others.

And if you're wondering what a lack of self-criticism can lead to, simply counter its benefits and the picture will become clearer in no time. Disadvantages of self-criticism:

• Self-humiliation and self-flagellation
• Decreased self-esteem and personality destruction
• Depression and unstable mental state
• Lack of confidence in yourself and your abilities
• Apathy and inaction
• Inability to make decisions
• Closedness and indifference
• Negative outlook on life and yourself
• Inability to see your strengths
• Excessive demands on yourself
• Deterioration in communication with other people
• Feelings of guilt and susceptibility to manipulation
• Lack of positive emotions
• Development of mental disorders

These shortcomings cannot be written off, but we repeat that only unhealthy self-criticism has this effect - intensified and taken to the point of absurdity. If you suddenly notice something similar about yourself, you can try to correct the condition yourself - focus on successes and achievements, surround yourself with positive people. But when such methods fail to change your attitude towards yourself, it makes sense to seek help from a psychotherapist. An experienced and qualified specialist will help you develop new behavior patterns and get rid of such poisons as guilt, self-examination and devaluation of your own personality.

We hope it has become clearer to you why and how self-criticism can be harmful. And you can make a small conclusion about why the lack of self-criticism also does not lead to anything good by watching this short video lesson.

But what kind of self-criticism should be so as not to destroy a person, but to make him better, promote growth and motivate him to new achievements? The next section is devoted specifically to this issue.

How to criticize yourself correctly?

The main and, perhaps, the most correct formula of self-criticism is expressed as “plus - minus - plus.” This means that if you manage to do something, that's great. But if the attempt was unsuccessful or you made a mistake, you need to admit it, reconsider, draw conclusions and do it right next time.

In general, to be able to properly criticize yourself, it is best to have a scale formed from your values ​​and beliefs. You also need to have a healthy lifestyle. A reasonable and objectively self-critical person knows what is important to him and can determine what traits and qualities he needs. After all, this is what helps to find the right direction for self-development. In this case, self-criticism will be reasonable, will become a good support and will serve as an incentive to improve yourself and achieve success.

To develop constructive self-criticism, we advise you to accept that there are no ideal people in the world, not to get hung up on the desire to always be right, but also not to retreat from objective confidence in the correctness of your position, and listen to it, learn to enjoy life and not lose sense of humor.

But let's talk more specifically about tips that will help you develop a good inner self-critic.

Be honest with yourself

Self-criticism is, first of all, honesty and frankness towards oneself. You can deceive anyone, but not yourself, and there is no point in trying to disguise something, hide or justify yourself. By learning to tell yourself the truth about yourself, you will take a huge step forward and make your conscience that inner observer who will limit you in unwanted words, actions and deeds.

Don't despise yourself

No mistakes, setbacks or failures are worth making you stop respecting and start hating yourself. Self-criticism is self-development, and you must understand that you need to work on yourself without feeling like a useless or worthless person. It is important to understand that you are not criticizing yourself as a person, but your wrong actions, misconceptions, erroneous opinions and views. Learn every day, extract valuable experience from everything that works and doesn’t work out. Mistakes are part of the lives of each of us, but they are not a reason to destroy your inner world.

Curb your ego

Every action has a motive, and it can be both positive and negative. Let's not go into depth with examples, but give the simplest one: you can treat someone favorably, but what is the reason for this? Are you doing this just for fun or do you want to gain some benefit for yourself? Often people act based on selfish and selfish goals. Try to “catch” yourself in such actions and resort to self-criticism. Otherwise, you can succumb to self-deception, thinking that you are a good person, when in reality you are someone who wants only for yourself and for yourself. By working on your ego and reducing it, you will become more critical of yourself.

Embrace your pride

Pride, like most others, is good in moderation. If it goes off scale, a person immediately begins to defend himself even from harmless attacks in his direction. Pride can say that we are always right and not give other opinions the right to exist. Because of this, it is difficult to objectively evaluate yourself and understand the true reasons for your actions. If we “lower our noses” a little, we will see ourselves from the outside, and the fact that those around us do not wish us harm and do not want to offend us. In addition, this will allow us to stand on the same level with other people and begin to show more respect for them, and the latter, as was said, is a quality inherent in self-critical people. But there is no need to lose pride, because its absence, like the absence of self-criticism, will only make things worse.

Don't blame yourself

Criticizing ourselves correctly is not at all easy, but it moves us forward. Therefore, again about balance - you need to analyze your actions, but not experience it. Sometimes understanding that you are to blame is useful - it is a manifestation of conscience. However, if guilt hangs like a weight around your neck, it leads to self-criticism and a state of unhappiness. What's done is done, life does not stand still, and you too must move forward. To do this, you need to realize where you were wrong and focus on doing the right thing.

Be wiser

You have decided to develop self-criticism. Your behavior has begun to change, you pay attention to your mistakes and do everything to prevent them from happening in the future. You have become a better person. But now your acquaintances, relatives and friends behave completely differently - as they are used to, and a feeling of internal protest begins to take hold of you. And here it is very important to understand that there is no point in opposing yourself to other people (and vice versa). Nobody owes you anything - that's one thing, everyone lives as they see fit - that's two, everyone is at their own stage of development and formation - that's three. Instead of dissatisfaction, resentment or anger, show wisdom - act as your gut tells you, and show others by your example what a harmonious and developing person is.

Listen to people

It is not always possible for a person to be able to independently see what he is wrong or mistaken about. But those nearby can clearly see it. Competent self-criticism is also an outside skill. And you need to develop it in yourself in every possible way, because it will only have a positive effect on your personal growth. It is not always the case that when they tell you that you are doing something wrong, they want to insult you or belittle your dignity. Many people wish you well and want you to become a better person. The sooner you learn to respond adequately to the comments of others, the faster your work on yourself will produce results.

Criticize yourself out loud

This is a very useful and effective technique, in one way or another connected with everything that we have already said. If suddenly you did something wrong or acted recklessly, do not be afraid to admit it to other people. The benefit of this is, firstly, that reasonable people nearby will not only understand you, but will also help you understand where exactly the mistake was made and correct it. And secondly, when your behavior upsets someone or you let someone down, self-criticism out loud will let that person know that you admit your mistake and ask for their forgiveness. Surely they won’t start accusing you of anything additionally either. But here it is worth saying that this technique should be used only with those who have a positive attitude towards you, otherwise your confessions will serve as a weapon that the enemy can successfully use to his advantage.

Try to always remember that your task is to learn to reflect and be honest with yourself in order to reach a new level of yourself, becoming able to overcome your weaknesses, misconceptions and prejudices. Self-criticism serves as the main objective self-assessment and the ability to see one’s positive qualities and advantages over other people.

If you really want to progress, you definitely need to learn how to criticize yourself correctly. As one famous proverb says: “We see a speck in someone else’s eye, but we don’t notice a log in our own,” and this is very reminiscent of human behavior. So, self-criticism is the right path to learning from mistakes, achieving mutual understanding in communication, establishing harmony within yourself and improving the quality of your life.

But don’t rush to say goodbye to the article - we want to say a few more words about excessive self-criticism, or rather about how to get rid of it, because this issue is no less relevant.

How to Eliminate Excessive Self-Criticism

Like a lack of self-criticism, excessive self-criticism harms a person’s mental health, which negatively affects his entire life. To get rid of it, you need to understand that negative thoughts are a reflection of our habits, but not of our personality. And to eliminate such habits, you should learn to pay attention to their manifestation.

A good way is to write down all your self-critical thoughts in a notebook. When your condition worsens again, these notes will help you

Self-criticism– a person’s reflexive attitude towards himself, the ability to independently search for mistakes, evaluate his behavior and the results of thinking. The presence of self-criticism is considered a condition for the mental health of the individual.
Wikipedia

Self-criticism– such a critical assessment is an objective and realistic assessment of one’s own strengths and weaknesses, talents and shortcomings, etc. This kind of self-analysis is part of healthy self-acceptance.
Psychological Encyclopedia

• Self-criticism is the ability to take a detached look and evaluate oneself and one’s actions; see your own mistakes and correct them if possible.
• Self-criticism is an attitude towards one’s thoughts, words and actions without prejudice to one’s own rightness.
• Self-criticism is a sober assessment of yourself and your actions in various circumstances, it is a combination of intelligence that allows you to see your mistakes and courage that allows you to admit them.
• Self-criticism is the absence of narcissism in the presence of self-respect.
• Self-criticism is an active desire for one’s own personal growth.

The benefits of being self-critical

• Self-criticism gives direction to self-improvement.
• Self-criticism gives you the opportunity to recognize your shortcomings and abandon them.
• Self-criticism gives strength for an objective assessment of one’s own “I”.
• Self-criticism gives you faith in your own capabilities.
• Self-criticism frees you from narcissism and disrespectful attitude towards others.

Manifestations of self-criticism in everyday life

• Professional activity. Self-criticism helps a person to adjust his actions to achieve career heights.
• Education. The best students are people who have healthy self-criticism. This quality helps them make efforts to gain knowledge, not limiting themselves to “superficial views.”
• Scientific experiments. It is self-criticism that helps scientists separate random errors from an initially incorrect message.
• Interpersonal communication. A person who willingly and respectfully listens to the opinions of others, but does not consider himself an expert in all areas of knowledge at the same time, exhibits self-criticism.
• Family relationships. Building a family is always a search for mutual compromise. People who are capable of admitting they are wrong and finding a compromise demonstrate self-criticism.

How to achieve self-criticism

• Work on yourself. Having learned to admit one’s incompetence in certain matters, one’s imperfection, a person cultivates self-criticism.
• Psychological trainings. Strong psychological training can help with the main thing - to accept and love yourself with all your strengths and weaknesses. By loving and respecting yourself, it is easier to learn self-criticism, perceiving it as a creative rather than destructive principle.
• Analysis. Find opportunities for daily solitude and reflection on what happened during the day. Don’t reproach yourself for mistakes; think about how to correct them and not repeat them in the future.
• Action. Every day, do something that will make you a little better than you were yesterday.

Golden mean

Narcissism

Self-criticism

Self-criticism, self-flagellation

Catchphrases about self-criticism

Self-criticism is an integral part of the inner world of a developed personality. This quality has nothing to do with the experience of destructive feelings of guilt and self-criticism. It is, rather, an adequate and objective view of oneself from the outside. Self-criticism allows you to see both your strengths and shortcomings.

Not surprisingly, moderate self-criticism has practical benefits in a variety of areas. In professional activities, self-criticism makes it possible to find more effective ways to achieve results. If we talk about learning, then this quality can be useful in order for a person to make more efforts to obtain the necessary knowledge. Self-criticism helps scientists separate inherently incorrect messages from random errors. Speaking about relationships between people, it is worth noting that people who can adequately evaluate themselves are respectful of the opinions of others and are able to learn something new from those who understand a particular issue better. In family life, self-criticism provides a chance to strengthen the relationship between spouses and lay the foundation for finding a compromise. Those who can evaluate their actions objectively are able to build a strong family.

Self-criticism is highly valued by individuals who cannot be content with only internal harmony, wanting to see their real life achievements. People who have enough internal well-being do not need self-criticism. Modern psychotherapy in no way encourages criticism of oneself. Experts in this field for the most part impose on a person the choice of accepting or not accepting oneself. At the same time, psychotherapists actively instill the idea that self-criticism is a manifestation of non-acceptance of oneself. In many cases, fairly balanced people who are characterized by moderate self-criticism are treated.

WHAT SELF-CRITICISM SHOULD BE

The basic formula for correct self-criticism is the plus-minus-plus scheme. If you did something, then it's good. If you failed, then admit the mistake and do it well next time.

In order to evaluate ourselves correctly, we must have a scale that will be formed based on our beliefs and values. You need the right life positions in order to judge yourself correctly. A reasonable person determines his value system, decides what qualities and character traits he needs, and then engages in self-development in the right direction. At the same time, such a person provides himself with both reasonable criticism and sufficient support. Try to criticize yourself in a way that motivates you to move forward towards success.

You can practice self-criticism out loud. Having reasonable people around will always ensure that your criticism is understood. At the same time, a completely constructive conversation will arise between you, taking place in a friendly direction.

If you have let a person down, you can criticize yourself, which will be a kind of request for forgiveness. A reasonable person, understanding that you admit your mistakes, is unlikely to pursue additional charges. Be careful when doing this, as a hostile person may use your self-criticism against you. Try to formulate a critical remark so that it relates to this specific situation, without touching upon undesirable points.

THE HARM OF EXCESSIVE SELF-CRITICALITY

It must be remembered that self-criticism is a useful quality that helps a person improve. At the same time, self-criticism should not reach the point of self-criticism, which clearly has negative consequences.

Among the disadvantages of increased self-criticism, it is worth noting the following disadvantages:

• It reduces self-esteem and destroys personality;
• Self-criticism breeds uncertainty and inaction;
• Excessive self-criticism is a quality that others do not like because it turns you into yourself;
• Self-criticism gives rise to a pathological feeling of guilt, which is why a person who is characterized by this quality is easy to manipulate;
• Excessive self-criticism wastes time and takes away positive emotions;
• Self-criticism prevents you from finding the optimal way out of the situation and make the right decisions.

HOW TO GET RID OF EXCESSIVE SELF-CRITICALITY

Understand that negative thoughts are a reflection of habits, not your personality. In order to begin to change old habits, you need to learn to record their manifestation. Write down the self-critical thoughts that come to you. Such notes make it possible to control your thoughts when you feel bad, and also to see how they affect your future condition.

At first glance, recognizing self-critical thoughts is quite simple. However, it is not. This is especially obvious in those who have come to terms with their low self-esteem, since such people can no longer perceive themselves differently. To begin with, it makes sense to learn to recognize self-critical thoughts and analyze how they affect your life. In most cases, changes in your emotional state are the most reliable indicator that you are overly self-critical.

Start loving yourself, praising your achievements, even if they are insignificant. Praise yourself even for failures and mistakes, because you decided to do something. Try to record in your head any step in the right direction, while giving yourself a sufficient dose of praise to your loved one.

In the case when a person has qualities that he does not like about himself, he should eliminate them if possible, and then continue on his way. What cannot be fixed must be let go. It won't always be easy, but it is necessary.

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